On a normal day my pain is bearable... it flares up several times a day to an extent but I can handle it. Every few months I have a really bad day when the pain is unbearable. I do not think I have it worse than anyone else for the most part, but the flare ups can be evil. As for the suicidal thoughts they are due to a mixture of things. The pain is a big part of it but not the whole part. There are things in my past that I cannot escape and that is the other big part. xx
I know a few people with Reynaud's and do not think I have it because as you say the loss of colour in extremities is not there. I think ice and the cold just effect me more because I end up involuntarily tensing up and this triggers the fibro.
Peter is amazing... I love him to bits and although he annoys me sometimes I would not ever trade him for anything in the world xx
Doc said that cold causes our muscles to tighten, which causes the fibro to hurt worse.
See, you made me smile with your last comment. Bad people don't make me smile. And also, your dog trusts you and he wouldn't love you and trust you as he so obviously does, being super-relaxed in your arms, if you weren't a good soul. Believe it or not, my dogs DO know when they've met someone not nice and have made it clear to me with growls. And darned if they weren't right, as I discovered a bit later. I should have trusted their instinct in the first place.
Hope you are continuing to feel a bit better and the superflare is receding some. Do you think the movie sear could have caused it? When I sit in rigid or hard seats, my back goes ballistic. Just a thought...
Mike, trust in the good in you, trust in Peter and trust in your therapist. Those things might feel inescapable today but they are not written in stone into your soul forever, unless you allow them to fester there. But I've found that the people who do the work to get better DO get better and the ones who simply let it fester out of fear are the ones who usually don't.
Without a doubt it was sitting in the cinema for so long that has caused it... whether it is the light and noise setting it off as well or just the positioning I do not know. Doggies know everything... they are very clever... For some reason doggies always seem to like me so I guess I am not pure evil, but that does not mean I am not worthless xx
I forgot about the lights and noise aspect, because I haven't yet run across it. Sir, it sounds like the cinema is not a restive place for you. I can see how all of those aspects could be very annoying to the Fibro Monster. You gave it a headache and a butt ache and an ear ache, Mike! And now it's grumpy.
If doggies like you, they can tell you are GOOD. They don't hang around evil or even nasty. My chihuahua Johnniecake despised my realtor who was also a friend. Come to find out the realtor had lied to us about many things and bungled up many aspects of our house sale. The lying really got to me. Johnnie knew, though, that George wasn't trustworthy.
Do you trust Peter's judgment? And does he find you worthless or part evil? No. So, I ask again, you trust his judgment, right? He sounds like a very canny and together man. Trust his trust in you, if you can't yet trust n yourself on your own.
To be fair Mike Ive got some other pain issues too. Which have been diagnosed finally and on meds doing a so so job a conteolling the pain. Im aooo glad you are better today tho!
It's good to hear that you have some diagnosis that are helping to get some of your pain under control, while knowing what's what. It's a start, at least.
Wishing you a good night, Mike, with good thoughts and happiness!
Yes. I would like to wish you the same. Take good care of yourself, Mike and enjoy the beautiful Scottish fall.
Thank you both, I am feeling a lot better now which is good :D xx
Mike,
That's a very big step for you. I'm proud of you for being so brave and taking these steps to help yourself. You chose to keep going and not give up. Bravo for you.
You may still have some up and down days. Don't despair Mike. Don't forget, the sun will always rise again the following day. Meaning that there will always be good day after the bad.
Hope you are well today/tonight.
Take care,
Petunia
Hey Bud!
Hope you feel better everyday! Please be kind enough to 'show up' to see these wonderful care-givers who have been sent your way to help you get through all of this and get to a better place!
We care about you, we know you deserve to be well and happy!
Love,
SK
Mike,
I am sorry to hear your horrible experience at the theater...that's why I can't go to the movies anymore. Sitting or staying in one position for an extended period triggers stiffness and pain of all sorts, so I watch movies at home instead. I have to pause several times to get up, walk around and strech to avoid this. When I don't have much pain, I bounce on a trampouline for a little bit while watching a movie.
What kind of heating pad are you using? I have an electric blanket that I used to use but it seems to make my pain worse. I now use moist-type heat packs that you heat in the microwave - that seems to help relax my muscles.
When I have a flare-up, I try not to do anything if I can; I still have to work but I don't try to do anything else. I let my husband do the housework and other things when I am in pain.
I think I am going to have to follow your example and watch things at home instead and pause several times throughout the film because I cannot do on the way I have been. I use an electric heatpad from boots, I think it's brand is dreamland or something and it is manufactured by imetec UK. xx
Sometimes sunrise is so long from sunset though it is impossible to see the light :( xx
I will definitely show up to all my sessions. I am not going to be any better unless I let people help. I have a session tomorrow that I will be going to at 13:30 :D xx
This is how we all need to do things - adjusting them so they fit our needs. Learning how to adjust/accepting that we need to do so is what's important. We can still go on and have a life, just doing it using a different approach.
Mike, these three sentences prove to me that you WILL get better - and you already are getting better.
This is true, Mike. So you have to learn to trust and accept that light does follow darkness. It always does.