I don’t think I have ever tried so hard and failed so bad.
I have been out of “official” work for 8 years now. When my 3 were still home, I got child support and they also helped out some and I had various projects going which helped to bring in some income as well. Over the years we raised rabbits and sold them, raised chickens and sold eggs, pullets/layers and dressed chickens. We raised turkeys, guineas, ducks and geese as well and sold eggs and birds. It was all things that could be done from home while raising my children and helped to provide activities for them as well.
I still keep 12-18 layers now, but no longer have the rest. As my helpers moved out, I had to downsize as I could not handle the physical work involved anymore.
Since my son moved out I have basically had no income coming in. About 9 months ago I started a online vintage/resale business in the hopes of having some income, but while it has done ok at times, most of the time I see very little activity. I’m at my wits end - I have tried advertising, sharing on social media and all that, but still it falls flat. Since the first of the year I have made less than $200/month. I long ago cut any extra expenses and shaved the rest to the bare bones, but still $200 doesn’t go very far to cover things.
Over the last 3 or 4 years I have tried to find work in town (I live 30 miles out), but I keep running into the same issues. Very seldom has any type of “office” work been available, but the few times it has been, I wasn’t qualified or else, thanks to my associates degree, I am “overqualified”. 
And now, thanks to a constantly numb hand, typing doesn’t go so well anyway. You can always find work in the fast food places, as a housekeeper in the nursing homes or hospital or in various manufacturing places but I can’t keep up with the physical demands/pace of the work. The last one I tried was as a housekeeper in a nursing home. Even with another girl doing some of the heavier work, by day 3 I was in so much pain that the nursing staff was questioning if I was going to be ok and it took me weeks to even begin to see improvement in the flare.
I am so tired of trying and constantly beating my head against the brick wall.
1 Like
Struggling, I’m so sorry you’re going through this! I had just been thinking about you and hoping that your online business was doing well. It doesn’t sound like you should try the “housekeeping” type job, since things went so badly last time. I really hope that some kind of job opens up that would be perfect for you. Keep the faith, girlfriend!!! I’ll be saying prayers 
AussieMom -
I will take all the prayers I can get!
I don’t know how much to start “panicking” or if that is what my problem is already. 
The anxiety/panic disorders I already deal with tend to have me blow things out of proportion already, add in the inferiority/failure issues and that compound things even more. When I started the shop it did fairly well - you wouldn’t get rich but it meet the needs more or less then last fall things dropped off and they haven’t picked up yet. I am still hoping they will again. But right now things have me worried.
I have had different ones tell me I need to get on disability, but I don’t think they would accept it if I did file. My uncle tried for years to get it, while dealing with prostate/lung/brain cancer and he died before he got it. (They approved just before he died and the back pay went to his estate, but they drug their feet starting it, so he never saw any of it.) Two neighbors struggled for several years with severe health issues trying to get it - the one finally did, not sure on the other. So the pessimist in me fails to see how I could get it.
At this point I have been trying for over 2 months just to get a medical card and still haven’t gotten the ok on it, nor any idea when I will get it or a guarantee that I even will. From what they said I can’t apply for disability without a doctor first saying I am disabled, but since I can’t even get into a doctor right now without the insurance, I don’t think that will happen any time soon. I did get some food assistance, which greatly helps! But I was told that since I am not over 60, disabled or have children at home, I can’t get any other assistance.
1 Like
I’m so glad you got some food assistance, Struggling! I hope someday we can change your name to “ThrivinginKs” 
You are too precious to always have to struggle! But, these days, with the Covid driven resession, our Nation is indeed struggling. And, wonderful folks like you, who were already struggling to get by, get a double whammy!
My company just recently took me off of a regular salary, and I’m now paid commission on the work I do. It scares me to “not know” what my salary will be, from month to month, and if my hands will hold out, from all of the typing, but we all do what we must to survive.
I have heard that most people are turned down the first time they file for disability. But, you won’t know, until you try. It has also been said that your chances are better if you hire an attorney, but they will take a percentage of your disability income. I know that eventually I will face this same issue. It does sound like you really need a doctor to sign off on it, but that will be pretty difficult if you can’t afford to see your doctor. Have you thought of calling an attorney that specializes in disability cases? Often, you can get “free” advice the first time you go to an attorney.
I’m glad we have this special place to share our thoughts, hopes, and fears. Sending hugs and prayers, my friend!!! 
PS: Struggling, I know you love dogs and other animals. Is there a possibility that you could be a pet sitter, or maybe start a business where you go by and spend time with other folks’ pets while they are out of town or at work??? Just a thought…