Just Venting

Im 25. my fibro is really severe. i cant do much if anything. its so hard to have friends or anyone around understand. i feel so lost and alone. i was just starting to get out on my own when i got sick. and now ive ended up back at home with my parents whos been putting a lot of pressure on me to leave. they constantly tell me if i dont like it here or my rules then leave then. or what they would do if they were me or what they would have. they dont get it at all. my dad doesnt even believe in such a thing as fibro. when i constantly try to explain they ask me why do i care so much about what they believe or think. what do i want someone to understand so bad and why is it such a big deal..... speechless... thats what it did to me.

i lost my car due to not being able to keep it up and it got ruined. i had no money. i even lost my job as a nursing assistant. i couldnt keep up and my attendance was bad because of being sick. now im just stuck. i cant work. i cant do much. i have no support. i have no help. no one ever even ask how i feel or do i need a helping hand. i sit here as i write this now, listening in to a conversation downstairs in another room. my family. they all seem so happy. no cares in the world. and then here i am. sick. ran out of meds. calling doctors all day. limping. barely able to get up and down the stairs. they even seen me laid up against the stairs or barely able to walk. it didnt break a conversation or anything, no one even asked to help. not that im looking for attention. but im just trying to explain how i feel. theyve been all out today and planning to go places but yet, i sit here not able to do a thing. it hurts. i been crying all day. im upset. im mad. i dont even know who to be mad at. iven been denied social security. im trying to appeal but honestly i dont know what to even make of that.

i cant date, especially living at home anyways. i have no one. once i say i dont feel well all conversations or phone calls usually end with a "ok well bye. ttyl."

im just going through it. im sad. and in a really bad flare. i feel like i have a huge boulder on my back and cement blocks on my arms and legs.

They need to find a cure NOWWW

aww that was really sweet of you and made me smile for the first time today. seriously. thank you. im going to try my best to. the doc just called in some pain meds. its a much lower dose and different kind. i dont know what he was thinking. im upset about that. im going to stay in today and watch some movies. and im glad i made some food ahead of time last night for today because i felt this flare coming on. chicken panini sandwhiches. not the choice but its better than nothing. and i will look ahead to better days. yes ive been really stressed about my situation and i dont know what to do to fix it. so the pain has been worse. but you definitely helped

Hi Teesa...

Reading your words of frustration and pain,emotional and physical,have touched me deeply. It's so hard to be dependant on people/family especially when they don't make you feel like they understand. Lovett was right when she said that we have all run into this problem with family and friends. It must be especially difficult when you're right in the middle of everyone just laughing and carrying on. It is so hard for them to identify with what we're going through because they can't see it. And if they're unwilling to even try to educate themselves to better understand what you're going through...we all understand how much that hurts. I hide in my bedroom when i'm feeling overwhelmed and do like you. put on a movie or watch shows that i've downloaded. Anything to distract from the chaos inside my head.Do whatever you need to do to keep your stress level down and try not to feel guilty for taking care of YOUR needs. So take a deep breath. We can't always get away from the stress but sometimes it's the little things that make us feel better.

I'm glad to hear that your doctor called something for your pain. It might not be what you're use to but it might help take the edge off.

Enjoy your panini, settle in and focus on relaxing. if I may suggest headphones....to tune out the other noise. i love them for when i'm up at night,unable to sleep. Keeps me focused on what I'm watching.

Sending you Big Gentle hugs. Come and chat with us whenever you want. Glad to have you. Reading each others stories and feelings helps us to not feel like we're alone. And we're not.:-)

Carolyn

Hey Teesa,

I am so sorry to hear about all of the pain you are going through - physically and emotionally. I know how debilitating fibromyalgia really is, and also how frustrating it is to feel invisible in the midst of all the other symptoms. When I was first diagnosed, my family tried to be more understanding. But that quickly turned to a little bit of malice when I wasn't able to participate in activities or I just felt completely depressed and helpless. My brother even said that he felt that fibro was just my "blanket excuse" to get out of doing things or helping around the house. The words REALLY hurt and they honestly still do even though I have tried to forgive.

I can imagine it is hard for people who do not have this disease to understand what a struggle it is to go through this every single day. But that doesn't mean they shouldn't try. Please know that we are your fibro family though and we are always here for you. I truly am sorry, and I know what a battle fibromyalgia really is.

Teesa I feel you're PAIN ! Same thing here except I have a twin brother who is ill too so at least I have someone close to talk to the rest of what you feel is the way I feel, I do not want to be alone but if I date she won't understand, nothing is fun anymore the things I used to enjoy are gone, I do want to encourage you not to give up, if you have no meds there are still things you can do, make sure you eat on a regular basis, please try and identify any foods or any stressers that make you feel worst don't exercise too much go for walks, try and join in with your family without telling them of your pain this will pull them closer to you, fibromyalgia, is a lonely walk we take by ourselves .

For me getting stressed out about my not having meds make me feel worst, also I am alergic to latex, peanut butter and jelly - grape to be specific, reeses peanut butter cups beer and wiskey hydrocarbons car exhaust and many more I haven't discovered yet what I am trying is to focus on my life even though it hurts I still have dreams and desires to fullfill, the longer

You go remember the life goals you had before you got fibro and then try and find a way to make them happen one day at a time. God bless you from Ben

Teesa,

Hi:-) . I am so sorry you are having a bad day. It is not fair this Fibromyalgia. Just remember you are not alone. It is easy to get down and depressed but you must fight on. I was sitting outside the other day and a yellow butterfly was flitting by it brought back a childhood memory of playing in the fields on my family farm. It made me joyful. It's not much but I hope you find your butterfly. I would be very happy to be your friend and I know others will be also.

O Teesa, while I was reading ur story I started balling. I could feel ur pain & frustration. What really hurts so bad is when ur own family won't acknowledge ur illness. It's hard enuf trying to convince health professionals & the general public that we are PHYSICALLY ILL. U are in the right place Teesa. I will be here for u & help u thru this. I want to give u the biggest hug...u are young enuf to be my child. So I'm gonna take u under my wings. I luv butterflies & birds. WHY DID I JUST TELL U THAT?? LOL I must be sleepy because that was a random comment. Have a good nite my luv & try not to stress, u found ur FMfmy rite here.

{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

I Get it… I’m thankful I have my husband who understands as much as anyone can who isn’t sick. My depression gets really bad because of this. You get tired of constant pain with no relief.
Social Security almost always denies u the first time. Get a attorney that only gets paid if you win and that will help.
I’m glad you and I joined this support group maybe it will help having people who really understand. Xxoo

Awww Char. Thanks so much. Im going to add u and send you my email if you like. I need all The love, support, and hugs i can get. Besides i feel you have a good spirit. Im doing better today. Trying to be positive. I have to realize no one will ever understand but u guys and that’s ok because it’s only stressing myself trying to explain to people who will never feel this pain or get what we go through or how strong we are

Hope you have had a blessed Easter. :-)

O sweety, I did send u a friend request last nite @ least I thot I push the rite button. Yes send me ur email address...Strange what u said about my spirit. I get that from ppl all the time. It's like I never meet a stranger & will start a conversation w/them. Makes my Hubby mad ..LOL. I don't care I luv ppl. I've always said that my biggest problem is I love too hard. {{{{Hugs}}}} Char

Thank you. Same to you. I hope you and all the others above ^^^ did as well. I didn’t do much. Laundry lol. And no babysitting today like usual. I don’t know how i do it. I’m just trying to get through day by day

I’m glad i joined too. Because of great people like you. Thank u

They are okay. Its better than nothing but not doing much

Carolyn I’m never on much but maybe u can send me your e-mail. I need a few friends.Thank you for all the nice words. It touched me. Thanks for caring. Im trying to hang in there

Thank you. I know you understand and that means a lot to me. Its sooooooooo hard to battle something no one can see but you. Thank you for being here and encouraging me.

Ben that was really touching and inspiring. Ill never give up on life goals but we all know how hard things are. Sometimes we just need a hand or a friend. Thank you. And God bless you as well for those words. Its good that you have a brother there but its bittersweet that he’s going through it too. We never want to see others hurt. Especially because we know pain oh so.well. I’m here if u ever wanna talk as well.

Char you sound like me. I love people and i love helping. I lived being a nurse asst. But i had to give that up for the bed lol.
You have a good heart i can sense it. And ill be sure to send it to u

Hugs

Its good to know I’m not alone and i would love to be friends. Send me a request. Thanks for the words. Weird you said that about butterflies. I love them. Its something so beautiful, pure, and amazing about them. They symbolize so many good things. Thanks and talk to me anytime. Im not the best but I’m trying