My Father was a wonderful man and a great doctor in California. He passed away about 32 years ago of Colon Cancer. He had planned to retire, when the cancer got to him and it was so sad that he and my Mother couldn't fulfill their dreams of traveling and just enjoying his retirement. About 2 days before he passed away, I went to the hospital to visit him. He was clearly agitated about something and he was very coherent. I asked him what was wrong. He had heard 2 young doctors in the hall way making fun of their patients and excited about the money they were going to make in the profession. I was stunned when my Father told me this. He told me the era of doctors who really care about their patients was not going to exist anymore. He said I would have to be be my own advocate and in the future, I would probably have to work very hard in finding doctors that really care and get the quality care that my Father always gave his patients. He had hundreds of patients throughout his life and there were those that couldn't afford his fees or the hospital. Well, I am very proud to say he still took are of those people and didn't expect anything in return. I have tears in my eyes thinking about this. Guess what?? He was right! It's such a struggle to get the Medical field to be patient with me and TRY to listen to what I have to say!! It's all about money and prestige. My Father was able to sense this way before it came in to the picture. I am just letting you all know that I appreciate all of you and unfortunately, we DO have to fight to get what we need for our illnesses. About 5 months after my Father passed away - my Mother died. She was so lonely without him and it was best because she lost the will to live when he passed away. I miss them so much to this day. Hugs!! Laurie
Hi Laurie, you should be proud of your Father. It sounds like he was a wonderful Doctor and Human being.
He was right, you do need to advocate for yourself as no one else will. It is unfortunate but it is all about Greed today. Doctors don’t treat the way they used to. You are lucky if you can get your questions in before they are half way out the door. I used to be a Endoscopy Nurse, and the comments that some of the male docs made about the female pts was not only unprofessional, but embarrassing . It always upset me. This didn’t always happen, but we had a select few. This is exactly how I learned to advocate for myself and others. Thank you for sharing Laurie, Gentle Hugs Leanne
You are so right, Laurie! I am fortunate to have 3 Drs like your Dad. I have been exposed to many of the type he describes though, there are many of them out there, and who knows what will happen to the few good ones once the govt takes over. They will either teach or move to Switzerland.
You are so right about advocating for your own health. Know what you are talking about, know your illnesses and injuries, keep a running list of symptoms, problems, and know your family history of autoimmune. Make google your best friend!
My Dad wasn't a Dr, but I miss him too, he would have just adored these grandkids of mine! So glad my Mom is still here to enjoy them!
We can never replace your parents, but welcome you into our family with open arms, Laurie!
Love and hugs,
SK
Oh Laurie, he sounded like a real gem! Now you have me tearing up.
Thank you for sharing this. Your dad was Aces.
Hi Leanne - Since you were a nurse, you obviously know what I am talking about. It's sad, but now it's important for us to speak up and get what we need to help us through our illnesses. If my Father were alive today (he would be in his 90s!!) he would be appalled at what is going on around him. When he was alive, making house calls was the norm for doctors. My father had to quit the house calls because a guy at the house my Father was visiting tried to get drugs from him. He was pretty violent and my father was hospitalized for several days. So, house calls were out of the picture for my Father. It's a whole different world now and things change and we go along with it, but we fight, if we have to. Laurie
Hi Pet - yes, in my eyes, my Father could do know wrong!! (smile). He was my hero. It was just so sad that all those years that he worked, he couldn't enjoy it when he was going to retire. Laurie
HI Sk - thanks so much for responding. I really appreciate it. My kids wore born after my parents had passed away. But I know that they would have been just delighted to be grandparents to them. They were just wonderful people and had been married almost 40 years when they passed away. Laurie
Laurie,
Thank you for sharing this with us! We're all probably tearing up!
Hi Laurie,
Your father was a wonderfully wise and generous man. They don't make 'em like him anymore! I love that he passed such valuable wisdom onto you. My parents are gone just about as long as yours, and I miss them both every day. Be very proud of your amazing father!
I need help soon after my surgery and the insurance says I have to leave the hospital after shoulder surgery. If they keep me for 3 days I qualify for in home care afterward. So, I have to find a friend kind enough to bring me to hospital. Hang around all day while I get my tendon and rotator cuff and some other tears repaired. Then,bring me home and drop me off. My service dog is helpful, butr he;s not trained to make sure I eat and test my blood sugar and figure out my insulin dose and remind me to take the other meds and make sure I don;t take the pain pills too often because for about 3 days after my last surgery I was kind of foggy..dress me for the next month while my arm cannot be moved.then I found out it;s illegal to drive in MN with a sling on. I guess if you only have one arm you can;t get a driver;s license. I'm getting nervous and doont know how to handle this. Any ideas for me? I'd appreciate it. If I was on medicaid they said i could get help but I actually pay quite a bit for my medicare and other insurance and they wont help me at home either. what do I do? zi'm disabled and not elderly enough and actually worked many years until my injuries caused a premature retirement. I feel like Im caught in the middle.
I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW HOW TO ASK QUESTIONS AND BE ABLE TO TALK WITH PEOPLE WOULD YOU BE KIND ENOUGH TO LET ME KNOW HOW TO DO THAT THERE WASNT MANY DRS LIKE YOUR FATHER I WAS LUCKLY ENOUGH WHEN I WAS YOUNGER TO HAVE A DR LIKE YOUR DAD BUT NONE AROUND NOW HOPE SOMEONE WILL LET ME KNOW HOW TO GET MY ANSWERS AS IM IN SUCH PAIN ALL THE TIME IM 72 AND I FINE IT VERY HARD YOURS TRULY RAINBOW
Hi Laurie, What an incredible man your Dad was ! I would like to add, my Grandfather was a physician in Watertown,Ma. He was just like your Dad. He cared for the people,not the money. He retired in the late 90s, he had never sent a bill out in his life. If a person could pay, great, if a person could not, no problem. Quite often he was paid in homemede goods. He also made house calls until retire. One thing I still do not understand, I lived quite a distance from him and needed to see an alergist. I saw him after my appointment, he asked what the alergist did for me. I showed him my arms where he preformed allergey tests, he asked what the Doctor charged, I said 300.00. He said come with me to my office, there he had the exact same equipment for the same test. He charges 5.00 . That was 1998. Wow are we ripped off today ?
On one visit to a Boston Doctor, it is a teaching hospital, I saw an intern before the Doctor came in. The intern asked me many questions, he wrote everything down ,I stated at one point that I came to them for answers and pain relief, I further said I don't think I can live like this any longer and have thought of ending my life. He never even blinked an eye, kept writing. This is a future Doctor ! Your Dad was right ! I am about to try another Doctor .
Dianne
Luarie,
Thank you so much for sharing this beautiful story about your Dad and Mom. I also come from era where my brother had serious heart problems at a very young age. Our Dr. would actually stop by after work ( came right to the house to check on him)
. So today I want to salute these wonderful Doctors that cared more about people than the almighty buc. I am sure there may be a few of them still out there , but very far and few between.
What a great memory to have of your father and wow did he ever get it right!!!! Hugs Lisa
ps this story took me back to a day when your community really did care much more about people, family, and hard times.
Hi Dianne - Thanks so much for responding! I had an experience with a Rheumatologist a while back. It was my first visit with him. The very second that I saw him - I knew he was not going to help in anyway. The way he looked at me and he didn't even introduce himself. He spent about maybe 10 minutes at the most examining me and started writing out a prescription for me. I came with a list of things I wanted to ask him, but he wasn't interested in what I had to say. He was very rude and abrupt with me. I told him what I thought of him and just left. I was so furious and it took me a little while to calm down. All of us will be in trouble if we don't learn to speak up and let these doctors know that we a deadly serious about getting treatment. We are entitled to this and no doctor has any right to treat us the way they do today. We need to be really strong and push forward and do what we need to do. I am still confident that there are some good doctors out there. We just have to work harder in finding them. Hugs Laurie
Laurie,
Your dear father gave you a wonderful gift in telling you what to watch out for with doctors. He was trying to protect you with that knowledge. What a wonderful man. The only thing that we can do is to advocate for ourselves, arm ourselves with knowledge and fight for proper treatment. As SK said, once the government takes over fully, it will be even more challenging.
I pray for all of us to stay safe.
Hugs,
Ally
Hi Lisa - I am happy that you got back to me. The years that I was growing up were the late 40s and the 50s, It was such a fantastic era at that time. We had nothing, really to worry about. It was a time of innocence and people really respected each other. Also, the doctors during this time were just phenomenal. Making house calls and sometimes just out of the blue, they would stop by just to see how the patient was doing. My 2 kids are in their 30s now, and I can't even begin to tell you what they have experienced, in growing up. We are so far removed from what children have gone through today. While in high school, my daughter's best friend was murdered. She also had 2 friends that commited suicide. What a horrible thing for a child to see. My son, lost 2 very good friends to car accidents and one to suicide. My son was just devastated! Thankfully, my kids grew up just fine and I am so grateful this. When my daughter was younger, she loved for me to tell her stories about when I was growing up. I really wish my kids could've been apart of that era we were in. Today, everyone should be their own advocate in whatever they do. We just have to fight harder to get the respect we deserve and the care we are entitled to. Hugs !! Laurie
I WOULD SAY THE GOVERMENT HAS TAKEN OVER AS THERE ISNT MANY GOOD DOCTORS ALL THEY WANT IS MONEY THE HECK WITH US I GOT A DOCTOR HERE AND ALL HE WILL I DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT FIBRO I THINK ITS TIME HE LEARNT IT AWFUL I HAVE TO TRY AND FINE OUT THINGS ON THE COMPUTER HOPE I CAN GET HELP FROM SOME OF YOU OR TELL ME WHAT TO DO HUGS FROM RAINBOW
HI Ally - I totally agree with you. It's sad that we have to fight so hard. When I look back to all I have been through and to where I am today, it really tires me out, seeing all I've been through and it's just absolutely ridiculous! The profession of medicine is filled with doctors that really are not involved with their patients lives or illnesses. Years go , when I had to go to the hospital for surgery, I was never nervous about it, because I trusted the doctors to do whatever was needed to be done to heal me. Now?? I am terrified of hospitals and all the mistakes that doctors do today, when operating. It's sad, but this is where this website comes in. Through all of you, I have the strength to keep fighting and move forward and really take all the suggestions and ideas I get from all of you, to heart!! Laurie
A friend of mine has a cousin that's a nurse. He told her I have fibro and she said it was a psychological disorder!!! I couldn"t believe that. She's in the medical field taking care of us and she doesn't even believe that we are in so much pain that we can't even function. My friend (who's a scientist) told her she was wrong and he said he informed her of what it really is and how people suffer from it. I just made me wonder if the people in my rheumatologists office or internists office have the same feelings.
Hi CarolAnne - I am so upset with what that doctor said. It's just unbelievable that they would think it is a Psychological problem. If you really think about it, how in the world, with all we go through with the pain, could we be making this up?? I often wonder too, what doctors might be thinking after I have left their office. Well, somehow, we have to prove them wrong! It's challenging - but I think that all of us are up to it to educate these so-called-called doctors. They certainly are not learning about it on their own. Laurie