So this is my first time becoming involved in a support site, since I was only diagnosed a few months ago. I can honestly say that Fibro has really thrown my life for a loop. Before I got sick, I was very active, going to the gym everyday, working full time, thriving social life, and a beautiful daughter. I wanted nothing more than to be the perfect wife and mother, and thats just not an option for me anymore. I don't mean to throw my own pity party, its just so nice to say all of this to people that I could understand. Besides the constant pain, and fatigue, I think the thing that kills me the most is the guilt. The constant guilt that I'm not being a good mother while laying in bed in pain, the guilt I feel every time I see my husbands face fall when he sees that its a bad fibro day. I never feel like I'm enough anymore, and the little I have left of myself seems to just slip away. I just so desperately want to be back to my old self, and I'm having a very hard time letting it go. I keep pushing myself to be more, and do more that I end up crashed and in bed for days. I'm just really hoping that someone who reads this will understand what I'm going through, and perhaps give me some advice. Thanks so much
Hi and welcome!️ I understand you perfectly. I was diagnose with Fibro in 2010 a few months after getting assaulted at work. I am a retired police officer and still married to one. I have a 12 year old daughter and a 15 year old stepdaughter. I lived being Supermom and Super-wife for many years. I worked 12 hrs shifts and still got home to cook dinner, clean, oversee the girls homework, go to the gym 1 to 2 hrs a day 5 times a week and do some laundry at times. Babysitter would stay 3 night out of the week and then I would take all the responsibility of a housewife.
Today my life is nothing like it was before… I have my mother living with me and I pay her to cook for my girls and husband and to do the deep cleaning I can’t do. This year has been the worst year I have had with pain and I felt like a total failed to my husband and kids because all I’ve been able to do is lay in bed. There is no sign of the superwoman I once was and it is really hard at days to except the fact I’m stuck being a stay at home wife and mother who can’t even do what a stay at home person does. I lost my career and was forced to retire and this was the hardest thing I had gone through. I loved my job and I felt I was helping people and making a difference every day. Know I sit here in bed and wonder what the hell I’m I here for? I don’t know what that is yet but I can’t give up because if I survived it was for a reason, I just have to find the reason.
I can understand you perfectly how you feel like we can’t do much and our family wouldn’t be missing much but believe me they would miss us to death. We are need that being to listen to our children or to be better friends with our husbands. GOD found a way to make us slow down and smell the roses. Know we have to find out what our purpose is in this life. Things will get better and in those good days enjoy yourself to the fullest with the people that matter the most to you. Remember ever day how lucky we are that we have an illness but we are not going to die because of our illness like many others that have illness that will end up killing them. We are very bless and we all have someone that loves us and needs us by their side.
Wish you have pain free day to come and that you get out and see life a little bit more bright. Sending you lots of soft XOXO’s.
Hi I'm you but 20+ yrs fast forward it is a process everybody with Fibro goes through, first of you wonder what's wrong, and then in 6 mnths you know there is something wrong and you go to the doctors confident they will fix you, then all the tests come back negative and you think that can't be right I feel like I'm slowly dyeing and your telling me I'm fine all the while you are in pain having trouble coping with the fatigue wondering if your lazy or crazy you go to more doctors and they say the tests say your fine have some anti-depressents by this time you are really confused, the pain is terrible, the fatigue is terrible, work is so hard to get through the day nobody you talk to has the foggiest what your on about, even your partner is certainly not your best friend at this time as you are trying to keep all the balls in the air this can go on for years until you get a diagnosis or you just crack under the pressure it took me 12 yrs and nearly dyeing before I stopped working and got some decent pain medication and I was a nurse ironic isn't it. At least now fibro is more accepted and there are websites like this one who can validate that you are not crazy, and it's just all in your head and they will give you adequate meds to help with the symptoms so you can have a quality of life that I had no access to. So don't feel quilty consider yourself lucky that you get to live a better quaility of life then the ones that have come before you. You do have to find a good doctor but there are many more medications now then what there used to be so do some research on fibro and you can find so much information on fibro, and try different meds till you find what works for you and then you will become me talking to someone else who has just been diagnosed Warm Hugs
️ I understand you perfectly. I was diagnose with Fibro in 2010 a few months after getting assaulted at work. I am a retired police officer and still married to one. I have a 12 year old daughter and a 15 year old stepdaughter. I lived being Supermom and Super-wife for many years. I worked 12 hrs shifts and still got home to cook dinner, clean, oversee the girls homework, go to the gym 1 to 2 hrs a day 5 times a week and do some laundry at times. Babysitter would stay 3 night out of the week and then I would take all the responsibility of a housewife.