Recently diagnosed, could use some help/ advice

I was recently diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I have had the symptoms for years and am happy I finally have an answer to the pain and it’s not the I’m crazy. My mom and dad were glad to hear a diagnosis as well. The problem I am having is I’m not sure how to deal when the pain gets bad. My parents want me to push myself and I’ve tried to explain to them that I have no energy and am hurting. Should I be able to push myself through the pain? What have people found to help with the pain. I use heat and ice at the moment but I don’t know what else I can do to help. I don’t fully understand what’s going on with me. I know that it’s a misfiring of the brain and nerves but I don’t understand why I can’t handle it and go on with my life.

Awww I'm sorry to hear you have been diagnosed with FMS. It does give you some relief that you know what it is now, but also takes a while to sink in and accept it.

You should definitely not push yourself througth the pain as this will only make it worse. Try to keep a little active, with very gentle exercise, as stopping altogether can make it worse too. You will find your balance with this in time and it will help considerably with managing the pain.

I found the most difficult thing was waking up in the morning thinking I was "normal", then after trying to get out of bed, realising that I am actually not well. It takes time to accept your "new" illness and for others too. They will struggle to understand what you are going through and will feel guilty that their loved one is suffering.

Try to take it easy and slow down a little to allow your body to rest as it will find it harder to cope with everything that your used to. It is frustrating but will ultimately help with pain and fatigue management.

There are a lot of medications out there to help with the pain and sometimes take a while to find the best one to suit you as we all respond differently. Sleep is an important factor too. Try to get as much rest and sleep as you can and this will help your pain levels.

We're all here for each other and hope we can help you through this

Dear S O P,

Here is a wiki definition of FMS, perhaps since your folks share in your happiness to get a diagnosis, they could also learn something about it and how it affects you. We are all accused of being lazy, it just comes with the disease, unfortunately!

There are books, but perhaps you could just tape this to the refrigerator, or leave it where they will find it and read it.

Also read the post Renie added for nutty nikki, it should ring a bell with all the symptoms listed!

Hopefully some info will add to their understanding of your illness. Sorry you are still struggling with this.

Wishing you much better days,


To address your last sentence, Sick of Pain, I think that every singe fibro person has asked herself that question about a million times!

Pushing past the pain is, in my opinion, a terrible idea. I did that in my last full time job and felt like I was going to literally die from the pain and I had such little energy that I just didn't care. On my days off, I'd lie on the couch, thinking I should try another job but hadn't the strength, physically or mentally, to do so. Not only that but my symptoms got worse and other areas started to hurt that never hurt before.

With this illness, unfortunately, rest is a huge part of feeling better at times. And I don't think that most fibro people can handle full time jobs. Some work part-time jobs, while still others end up going on disability from the pain. This is a chronic illness. Your parents need to read some really good material on the subject and they need to understand that you are chronically ill and will have pain and fatigue with this illness.

Your doctor can best address what meds will help you with pain. Unfortunately, what works for one fibro person may not help another. I'm on a low dosage of Lyrica and it helps somewhat. Better than nothing. There are other meds too, but, as my rheumatologist said, there really are currently no adequate pain meds for fibro, although he said there will be in 5 years or less. Still, even if you can get the edge taken off of the pain, it's helpful.

Maye you should allow your parents to come here and read other people's comments about their fibro. IT would certainly educate them about how serious an illness this can be.

The good news is that the meds we have do help some. I take Lyrica and it helps me to get through the day with my part time job. I've also learned to adjust my schedule to allow for naps and down time. Don't overdo things or you'll end up with a flare. Learning to manage the illness and your time helps. You only have so much energy to expend so learning how to use it wisely helps a lot.

The people here are great at supporting you and giving you useful advice and education. I strongly recommend coming back to learn more about your illness.

BTW, I love you beautiful kitty. Is he a tuxedo cat?

Hi Sick of Pain,

I am sorry that you have this awful, awful thing that NONE of us understand fully. I have found that over time, you learn to adjust yourself and your expectations of yourself so that you feel like you have some sense of normality. It is still a struggle to deal with the limitations and the pain, but like so many others have said, there are medications that can help. And time is a great factor in coming to acceptance, or some sort of acceptance. It doesn’t happen overnight. I hope that you are able to find a good doc who will help put you on the right path. Meanwhile, keep coming here. This group has been a Godsend to me.

Gentle hugs, MB

Thank you for the support and advice everyone. Petunia girl: thank you, he is a tuxedo cat, his name was Boots. Unfortunately he got out of the house a few years a never came back. I live in a wooded area with wild animals.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that about Boots. Poor guy.

It's good that you're here and we hope to help you with your illness. There is so much truth to learning how to pace yourself and manage your illness. It becomes less stressful and chaotic when we learn how to manage it better.

Hello Sick of pain I also love your. Kittie I hope you find some relief most of us just go day to day heck some days I go hour by hour if that’s all I can handle that day

I'm really sorry you have to have this condition. It's difficult to try to adjust your life to it somehow. Good to keep moving but don't push yourself. That just makes it worse. Gentle exercise or relaxation techniques may be good for you. Aquatherapy works well for some people. It did me. As long as the water is not cold, but warmed. Sometimes insurance will cover that and your doctor can order it for you. I had excellent relief just by changing my diet, cutting out sugars, caffiene and processed foods or high carb foods, keeping hydrated. Keeping a daily log of how you feel and what you did and ate and other events will help you pinpoint some of the things that cause you to flare up with pain.

Hopefully, they will find a cure for this soon. Meantime, you can get plenty of support on this website and have lots of people to talk to who are dealing with the same challenges. Hang in there, we understand what you are going through.


We all understand what you are saying, no energy and hurting has become the story of my life. I have been learning how to live with this for the past 3 years,For a long time I just kept thinking I can’t live like this, and even that perhaps they will find something else wrong and be able to treat it. You learn as time goes on how to manage it, acceptance is the hardest thing. Savella has helped me I couldn’t get through the day without it. I had to give up my full time job, and I have learned there is only so much I can do in a day, like everyone says if you do to much you will pay for it the following day.its frustrating to not be able to do all that you want. There is a balance that will Work for you,be patient and don’t give up, some days are better than others. If you have a special event, like a party on Friday night, you may need to rest more that day, and know that you may not be up for much the next day. warm water therapy and a 3 inch memory foam mattress has helped my pain. We all pretty much try everything we can to manage the pain. Take it slow, do ur research and find a dr that understands fibro

Maybe he just found a girlfriend! Always wish and hope for the best!

So how are you today? We would like to hear from you when you have time! Hope today is a good one!

A very good post with tons of useful info! (And the same for everyone else - very useful tips.)

Today I did ok… I was actually able to walk around a fair for a few hours. I was in pain once I sat down though. Tonight it’s worse so I’m hoping it’ll be better after some sleep.