JUST FINDING OUT I HAVE FIBRO HAS TURNED ME INTO A COMPLAINER AND A LIAR AT THE SAME TIME
I'D REALLY LIE THN GIVE A LONG LIST OF HURTS ACHES AND PAINS OF MY DAY OUTSIDERS DONT KNOW HOW HARD THIS REALLY IS AND I GOT TOO MUCH GOING ON TO STOP AND EXPLAIN:(
WANTING TO FEEL BETTER AND NOT HURT
ASKING MYSLEF IS THIS REALLY FROM THE FIBRO OR ALL IN MY HEAD JUST WONDERING IF IM ALONE
You are not alone, Pink.
This will get great response, because all 200 of us on this site know how you feel. There is nothing easy with this, and it takes down the strong ones too. It affects many parts of our lives, and teaches us to be strong and compassionate in new ways, but it changes things in other ways too.
Sometimes we hide out, or find it easier to lie and tell people we're fine, when we're not. Just the nature of it. It is hard enough for us to understand, for medical science to understand, though they are making leaps and bounds.
You are over a big hurdle in getting diagnosed, now they can help you, now you are here, we can help you.
So glad you found us, I'm so glad I said "hi" to you when you got here.
Everybody, meet my good friend, Pink!
Big hugs,
SK
You’re not alone, pink. That is for certain. I don’t see we have the ability to hold all our feeling inside. That is why this site is great, just think of all the people you’re meeting who lie everyday to shield our family and friends from the ugliness. Sometimes I’m beside myself in pain and don’t know where to turn. You have a support system now, one of us is here day or night to chat!
Take care and keep me posted how u are doing and how I can help!!
Sunny
Hi pink its suzyq we all know what its like to have fibrous somedays you're in a better mood than others but you have to take it one day at a time its nice to be able to talk to people who
It is funny you put this on to day, I went to the DR. yesterday, and was asked how are you doing today.After I said I am fine , I thought about it. I am not fine I hurt all the time. Then the long list of Q and A's. I hate those, You have to realy look at your problems at that time. I keep a lot of them in the back ground dont think about them and they are not there. How do you tell some one about it if they do not have it? I feel that even though I know I have problems that it is in my head. Even doing the things that I love to do, I love to walk. If I go 2 or 3 blocks I hurt so bad that I dont do it anymore. I know its not in my head on just that, it stops me from doing the things I love to do.
You are not alone. I hurt constantly all the time and I feel like complaining does no good either. My family say they support me but their actions do not show that. I currently am in the waiting period for Social Security Disability and I am only 43 years old. It was very difficult for me to come to the realization that I am disabled, and that I am not able to hold down a job because of this darn disease. The last three jobs I have had resulted in termination becasue of illness and absentences.
Outsiders do not understand. I get really bad looks when I go into the grocery store and ride an electric cart and here is this elderly person walking in the aisle shopping. I am very overweight but that is not why I suffer from this illness and they do not understand. My daughters want to go and tell them off (22 and 23 year old) but I will not allow them. It does no good anyway. People will make their own assumtion and we have to just grim and bear it. I had so much harassment at my work from co-workers and management at my work that it made me ultimately not go back to work after my medical leave was ending. My condition would not allow me to go back anyways but the stree was no good and it would have gotten worse if I went back.
You have to choose to find others- like this forum that will understand what you are going through, because it does not seem like the rest of the world understands because they cant see an illness they just figure it is not there. Best wishes to you. Please feel free to contact me. We could be each others support. ((((gentle hugs)))). Christina
Actually, guiafensenin has been debunked as a "cure" for fibro and I have posted the information on a different thread. I truly don't want others to be mislead. But please have a good day, SallyN.
Yup!!!
Maybe i't's easier for us to "accept" the notion of "making it up" than to accept that this crappy disease really is messing with our lives and we aren't in control of it. After all, if we're making it up, we're still in control.
I do just as you do, keith, pretend to myself over and over again that it's not really there until the bad days come. Kinda hard to ignore them, innit? ;-D
Oh, Pink, NO, you are not alone! So glad you asked! You'll find tons of us on here who can relate to your comments. We have a long thread devoted to "denial." I guess it's a huge issue for many (most?) of us.
And I don't think you're really lying to people. Let's face it, they DON'T want to hear it, even most of our loved ones. i cannot blame them, it's not anything enjoyable to experience or listen to. But I find now that the astute ones will know it anyway, by the exhausted look in our eye or the resigned tone in our voice on a bad day. They are the ones who'll ask and respect. The other ones, I never mention it to. Why bother?
But I'm glad you're here and hope you get some hope, help and comfort from the site.
Sometimes it is in your head-on fibro fog days. That would be the only time. Don’t let anyone tell you difference-not even yourself! I hurt all the time, and I no longer ignore it. I even argue and fuss with my doctors now. I am very vocal about this disease. Do not lie, but complaining may get you somewhere!
It is hard, I live alone my mother was never wanted to listen to me complain so I tended to complain to my church friends. Then I notice have 3 women in the church always had smiles and cheerfulness so I told myself to buck up and smile too no matter what. I asked one of the ladies how she did it and she said it was hard she just smile and hugged every one and then cringed with pain when they turned around. Another lady told me she could do it because she had family support and a husband who understood. The thing is I know it is real and not in my head because people tell me they can see it in me.
I hope this helps.
As you can see by reading these replies...you are NOT alone. I know exactly how you feel with not just the aches and pains BUT the complaining & lying part also. Myself..I am in my 4th day of simply finding it nigh impossible to get dressed and DO something b/c of feeling so wretched, tired, weak, depressed etc.....!
Last night a friend called to ask how I was doing and b/c I am so sick of saying 'Fine' that I told her the truth. I DID NOT like what she said to me. She said:: 'It is sad to hear that you are now defining yourself as 'A Fibro person' and continued to rattle on saying that if that's all I could talk about...then that's what I would be::'just another Fibro sufferer who feels the need to complain'.
Needless to say....that person is NO longer considered a friend of mine!!!!!
Just one of the many reasons why this is such a great site....we can tell 'our truths' without fear of being put down plus oft times receive some good suggestions to help us through the tough days. And there WILL be those tough days when we really need to vent about how we are feeling. Then there's the half decent days..such a relief they are.
I also went through the phase of thinking/wondering/hoping IT was all in my head....no it isn't and our bodies tell us that.
I believe there will be a cure someday and I surely hope it will happen in my lifetime and everybody else who is on this site (or haven't found it yet).
You hang in there & I send you many gentle hugs.
Geranium
1938-angel_2.gif (43 KB)
God bless you...of course you're not alone! I got diagnosed but I've been dealing with chronic pain and all sorts of various terrible things happening to me and I've discovered one thing.....no matter what I'm going through, Jesus is right there loving me and I can complain to Him all day if I have to. Then I get to the point that I've just accepted all the suffering and know that I am loved beyond measure and this is 'a light and momentary trouble compared to the eternal glory awaiting me that far outweighs it all'...2 Cor. 4:17.
Pain and suffering is only temporary and a result of a fallen world, but the promise of no more suffering is ours if we accept the forgiveness offered by God through the sacrifice of His only Son for our sins on the cross.
Sorry to preach but the truth is the truth.
Love,
sage
Isn't it funny how the word "fine" so easily pops out of our mouths when someone asks how we are?
My family doesn't understand, although they say they do. My father in law has been dealing with some hip pain for the past few weeks. My husband tells him to take it easy where he is always telling me to push myself and work through the pain. I finally had an emotional breakdown and told him how I really feel and how I resent statements like that. He has been more understanding since. Now whenever anyone in my family complains about a pain that they may be having, I just shurg and say "I'm so sorry, welcome to my world". Sounds non compassionate but that is the only way that they may have some understanding what I am going through.
Hubby says he's frustrated by how I "sleep a lot". The truth is, I sometimes don't want to wake up cause if I'm asleep, I'm not hurting.
Gentle hugs
that was a beautiful reply...being patient with myself is a tough skill to learn...and being patient with others in how they react to us too!
Wow, you aren't kidding! I totally "get" that most people just don't want to hear it, I do, but Geranium's "friend" put it in such a nasty way that it leaves a bad taste even in my mouth...and I'm not even Geranium.
GREAT reply, Draginfli. And other people, as well. So much wisdom here!
Hello Pink!
See, I told you there would be many respond, and you are only just beginning to hear from the group. My good wishes and prayers remain with you, remember what we talked about.
Hear from you soon.
SK
Thank you for understanding Draginfli and I certainly agree it's shocking for another to be insensitive. The thing is....this person has painful hlth issues herself so that's probably why her words hurt me so much.
This person phoned again apprx an hr ago and offered an apology for her 'harsh words'. I DID accept the apology but told her if she had said that to my face...I would have had 'assassination thoughts'...hahaha but had decided to put a curse on her instead. You can tell that I have a rather warped sense of humor...which gets me by for the most part.
Hugs right back at ya,
Geranium
Well Petunia my friend....you really wouldn't want to be Gerainium as I can get downright outrageous sometimes since I got this dreaded FM. I get retaliatory and misplace my sense of humor..NOT a good thing. Gotta buck up and deal with those less insensitive in a better way.
Amen!
1937-angelwithcane.jpeg (1.7 KB)