Still working at finding things I can do that interest me. I've started attending, first one, then two different groups. I decided to do these after a year of solid improvement. Doing a couple of things a week seems harmless. So I eased in slowly. It doesn't seem awful while I'm there. I really do enjoy the groups. But usually somebody says or does something that I dwell on/ worry about for weeks. These aren't bad people, it's just my weirdness. My doc calls it social anxiety.
Now I'm back to square one. Trying to pull myself out of a relapse and this anxiety adds to all the mess of fibro. Anyone else have this problem? What do you do for it? I already take two mini doses of anti-d's and anti anxiety meds.
Sorry to hear about the difficulties you are experiencing. It is good you are making the effort, don't be too hard on yourself if you find it is too much. P'raps they are just not the right groups for you. I think i have a similar problem, I imagine doing something will be much worse than it actually is. I am afraid I haven't got great advice, just maybe go and see Doc to see what else may be available to help you, such as counselling or CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy.
Thanks AnneV. I am starting counseling in two weeks. Yae! It means more work, but if it helps I'm all for it.
AnneV said:
Hello Kitty,
Sorry to hear about the difficulties you are experiencing. It is good you are making the effort, don't be too hard on yourself if you find it is too much. P'raps they are just not the right groups for you. I think i have a similar problem, I imagine doing something will be much worse than it actually is. I am afraid I haven't got great advice, just maybe go and see Doc to see what else may be available to help you, such as counselling or CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy.
I suffer from panic attacks and used to suffer from social anxiety. I cldint leave my house and if I did i needed to know were the bathrooms were so I cld flee. When the need arised. It took me a while to get over. Eventualy I went on a antidepressant and started forcing my self to go out. Also practiced breathing exercises seemed to help allot.
Glad to hear about the counselling. Sometimes things can be quite difficult for us Fibro people, as they often involve lifestyle changes. But with a positive attitude you can do this! Good luck
Hi, Same here after my illnesses hit 2yrs. Ago. My story is out here somewhere. I did not leave the house for a year. I felt like if I showed my face even out my front door people was watching me. I know how silly it sounds. But that is what I thought, no matter how many people said why would your neighbors be interested in when they might catch sight of me, like they didn’t have there own lives to live. Thy were not watching. You do leave the house and that feeling hits people are looking at me and they can read me like a book, it is all seen in my eyes and facial expression. How can you fake it. The depression, anxiety, pain, ailments, it’s all there, or that is what you see when you lift your head to make eye contact, that look you see from them, I actually put down the garments I had picked out and put them down and left the store I could not get home fast enough. So some of us know what you are going through. I am lots better than then. Want to talk or vent contact me and I am here for you and any body on this support group. Sorry to add this but I do not have any friends here, been here 14 yrs. had a good friend I thought but all she did was take, besides she has her own issues which I felt at the time of trying to heal myself, help my hubby heal, she was going through another sycho break herself all she did was drain me, had no respect for me or my feelings. She wanted me to get up after the hospital stay and go out shopping, I was so weak I could barely lift my arm to eat, had to be helped down stairs, and waited on when someone in the household had a little time to realize I might be hungry or need more water. I was told to drink one of those big mug, cups they give you in the hospital about every 2 to 3 hours I needed a refill, of course what goes in must come out had a few messes, because could not hold for long and needed help to get up and get there. I also had a hysterectomy when I was 35 now 51 so for those of you also suffering with hot flashes that come on for no good reason, then of course trying to cool down before your whole body feels like it is on fire on the inside out. Then the wonderful night sweats, they come in waves also for me. I can’t get comfortable, find the sweet then either a hot flash or some place don’t like it and you have to switch positions once again, I do this for about 2 hours before I can get to sleep by then it is around2 or 3 in the morning, do you try to sleep or just give up and mark it down as another night with no sleep. Been there done that to. It SUCKS BIG ONES. Enough about me. Sending soft big bear hugs and a pain free tomorrow, Donna
We can be friends Donna. Sounds like we have some common things going on. We're both in our 50's for one. I'm glad you're able to leave the house now. I go through periods, usually just several day stretches, where I don't leave my house. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. It's always followed by a trip to the grocery store or to go get some grand kids or some social interaction.
Kitty
Donna said:
Hi, Same here after my illnesses hit 2yrs. Ago. My story is out here somewhere. I did not leave the house for a year. I felt like if I showed my face even out my front door people was watching me. I know how silly it sounds. But that is what I thought, no matter how many people said why would your neighbors be interested in when they might catch sight of me, like they didn't have there own lives to live. Thy were not watching. You do leave the house and that feeling hits people are looking at me and they can read me like a book, it is all seen in my eyes and facial expression. How can you fake it. The depression, anxiety, pain, ailments, it's all there, or that is what you see when you lift your head to make eye contact, that look you see from them, I actually put down the garments I had picked out and put them down and left the store I could not get home fast enough. So some of us know what you are going through. I am lots better than then. Want to talk or vent contact me and I am here for you and any body on this support group. Sorry to add this but I do not have any friends here, been here 14 yrs. had a good friend I thought but all she did was take, besides she has her own issues which I felt at the time of trying to heal myself, help my hubby heal, she was going through another sycho break herself all she did was drain me, had no respect for me or my feelings. She wanted me to get up after the hospital stay and go out shopping, I was so weak I could barely lift my arm to eat, had to be helped down stairs, and waited on when someone in the household had a little time to realize I might be hungry or need more water. I was told to drink one of those big mug, cups they give you in the hospital about every 2 to 3 hours I needed a refill, of course what goes in must come out had a few messes, because could not hold for long and needed help to get up and get there. I also had a hysterectomy when I was 35 now 51 so for those of you also suffering with hot flashes that come on for no good reason, then of course trying to cool down before your whole body feels like it is on fire on the inside out. Then the wonderful night sweats, they come in waves also for me. I can't get comfortable, find the sweet then either a hot flash or some place don't like it and you have to switch positions once again, I do this for about 2 hours before I can get to sleep by then it is around2 or 3 in the morning, do you try to sleep or just give up and mark it down as another night with no sleep. Been there done that to. It SUCKS BIG ONES. Enough about me. Sending soft big bear hugs and a pain free tomorrow, Donna
Thank you, Anne. I'm loving the counseling. I had visit #3 yesterday. I have a lot of guilt. Some people get stuck in fear or anger or other "feeling". Mine seems to be guilt. I definately have pain spikes that are centered around one particular thing in my life that is associated with the guilt and some anxiety around that. We're working on it. Thanks again, Anne.
Kitty
AnneV said:
Hello Kitty,
Glad to hear about the counselling. Sometimes things can be quite difficult for us Fibro people, as they often involve lifestyle changes. But with a positive attitude you can do this! Good luck
Hi Pbeal. Yes, breathing does help. It seems that many many many of us with fm have some sort of anxiety. Glad you're meds help you. Mine help me too. Be well Pbeal.
Kitty
Pbeal said:
I suffer from panic attacks and used to suffer from social anxiety. I cldint leave my house and if I did i needed to know were the bathrooms were so I cld flee. When the need arised. It took me a while to get over. Eventualy I went on a antidepressant and started forcing my self to go out. Also practiced breathing exercises seemed to help allot.
Hi AnneV. We learn, after years of this, not to be too hard on ourselves. Sometimes it just seems new, like when we have a new symptom. Then we adjust again. I agree with what you said about making something much worse in our heads than it will actually be. Makes it hard to get there. I have found some new options. Also, I'm good with being home most days anyway. For the time being anyway. Be good to yourself.
Kitty
AnneV said:
Hello Kitty,
Sorry to hear about the difficulties you are experiencing. It is good you are making the effort, don't be too hard on yourself if you find it is too much. P'raps they are just not the right groups for you. I think i have a similar problem, I imagine doing something will be much worse than it actually is. I am afraid I haven't got great advice, just maybe go and see Doc to see what else may be available to help you, such as counselling or CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy.
I share your problem and mine is so hard to handle for me to. I have been a school counselor for many years. I taught college and been a school administrator. So I have always felt secure being in large and small groups. Over the years I had never even gotten butterfly’s in front of huge groups. Since I had to retire early due to my Fibro and all that comes along with Fibro. It is hard to even carry a conversation with anyone I don’t know. It is hard to keep a conversation going
and stop many times because I can not remember what I was going to say. I have met with my psychologist and he has been helpful making me feel better, but since I pretty much have the same training as he does it is hard to relate to my situation once I get into one.
So I have been avoiding large groups. I have shared with close friends that my medications cause it as an excuse. My sister who is close to me thinks I may have the start of Alzteimers. (Spelling ?)
Nothing like pushing me over the edge with that statement.
I met with my Rhemotolist this week and shared my concerns with her. She is a wonderful doctor and feels it is what they call Fibro Fog. So I researched it and helps to understand it comes with the disorder.
So I think I am going to try my best to work on what I plan to say a bit before I open my mouth. In the past I have been a man who was the life of the party, loved to help those shy folks to join in on conversations. Well at 62 I guess I am starting to back down in those larger social situations and just be a good listener.
I have never taken any meds up to the age of 60 and in great health so 1/2 my problems with this disorder is I always thought I would never have to worry about getting older. On top of that being a man with this is the other part that drives me crazy.
I don’t think I was much help, but I felt good sharing!
Ron
Hi Ron. I'm glad you shared. I do understand. I was a professional, as well. It takes quite a lot of adjusting to get used to feeling useless. But, we're not useless. It can take years to adjust to exactly what fibro is to you and to become comfortable with the new you.
Don't worry about the alzheimers thing. A lot of us here have been told the same thing or thought it ourselves. It's possible, but I bet it's just your fibro.
My therapist gave me some good insight last week. She said when I am so anxious that I feeling like committing myself I need to realize that there is anger under all of that anxiety. If we simply say the words "I'm angry", just let it come out of you, this can help relieve some of the anxiety. Enough to get us through that moment anyway.
I'm back to my worse kind of anxiety today and am glad I'm in therapy. Just found out our beloved daughter (32 yo) has been arrested. When I get hurt or worried about her, my pain level shoots through the sky and so does anxiety. This after spending a wonderful weekend in the sun at a lake with our other daughter. Highs and lows.
Staying home and secluded is really bad for anxiety. I am trying to work through this myself. Even just a little outing to go pick up a news paper or any excuse to be away from home...ever so slowly...is a good thing.
I share your problem and mine is so hard to handle for me to. I have been a school counselor for many years. I taught college and been a school administrator. So I have always felt secure being in large and small groups. Over the years I had never even gotten butterfly's in front of huge groups. Since I had to retire early due to my Fibro and all that comes along with Fibro. It is hard to even carry a conversation with anyone I don't know. It is hard to keep a conversation going and stop many times because I can not remember what I was going to say. I have met with my psychologist and he has been helpful making me feel better, but since I pretty much have the same training as he does it is hard to relate to my situation once I get into one. So I have been avoiding large groups. I have shared with close friends that my medications cause it as an excuse. My sister who is close to me thinks I may have the start of Alzteimers. (Spelling ?) Nothing like pushing me over the edge with that statement. I met with my Rhemotolist this week and shared my concerns with her. She is a wonderful doctor and feels it is what they call Fibro Fog. So I researched it and helps to understand it comes with the disorder. So I think I am going to try my best to work on what I plan to say a bit before I open my mouth. In the past I have been a man who was the life of the party, loved to help those shy folks to join in on conversations. Well at 62 I guess I am starting to back down in those larger social situations and just be a good listener. I have never taken any meds up to the age of 60 and in great health so 1/2 my problems with this disorder is I always thought I would never have to worry about getting older. On top of that being a man with this is the other part that drives me crazy. I don't think I was much help, but I felt good sharing! Ron