I know exactly what you're talking about, and for years I attributed my pain to my weight. My doctor said the location, type, and timing indicated FMS was to blame. Because of mental health issues, I cannot take any medications currently on the market for FMS, so I have to find alternative ways to cope. So, here's what I do for my hips...
I stretch a ridiculous amount, especially in the butterfly pose (bring the bottom of your feet together while sitting on the floor, then bring them back to your pelvis and slowly bend to bring your shoulders to the floor). I do this at least 3-5 times a day - even at my office. I also stretch my legs to the side, and I stretch my quads. Even when it hurts to the point of tears, I stretch. I also do the Yoga pose 'Cobra.' I don't do any other yoga, but that pose really stretches and opens the hips.
I NEVER lie on one side. I will lay on my stomach with one leg up (picture) or sometimes on my back, but never ever on one side. I figured out that I pay for if I do... not right away, but I do pay for it. So, if I wake up all comfy but I'm on my side... I force myself to move.
When I walk, I walk on uneven ground. The pavement can kill my joints. Walking on a trail may sound harder, but my theory is because you have to use more muscles to balance and whatnot, and because you have to concentrate more on what you're doing, there is less BANG! BANG! BANG! on your joints. Also, I have these shoes that were 'in' for a while... shape ups. Combined with taking smaller steps, these shoes allow a gentle flow for walking.
On bad days, I soak in a hot bath and double up on my aspirin. If I need to take 3 baths, I do. I have driven across town to go home and soak for a while then driven back to work. I know that the heat and the aspirin can work miracles for me.
Finally, I breathe. When it hurts more than I can bare, when I want to cry, when I want to beg for an aneurysm or heart attack, I breathe. Not those slow, deep, calming breaths... The breathing you do when you weight train... the focus it takes to maintain that can ease the pain and has the added benefit of add extra oxygen to your blood.
I hope one of these work for you. And don't give up... we all feel like we just can't take it, but that's why we have this site and these friends. We understand. You are not alone.
HUGS
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