Today is our oldest daughters 35th birthday! How did that happen? How did the years pass so quickly?
Months ago she and I planned for me to drive over the Mt. and visit for 4 or 5 days. They are about 150 miles away. I get to see my sweet little grand kids when I go and I don't feel like I'm missing out on their growing up years. Fritz is 4 and Ella is 2. Emily wanted me to work on her sewing machine and take her some doll clothes patterns that I used for her dolls when she was little.
One conundrum is that I don't know if I will be foggy and dizzy tomorrow. I never know ahead of time. Should be better with reduced meds. Will I be panicy? I never know. The other problem is that they don't have a guest room. They got little Ella a trundle bed so I could stay in her room when I come. Hasn't happened yet. Anyway, I asked if it would be too much trouble for them to pull out their tent trailer so I could sleep in it. That way I can retreat when I need to get away for a nap or something. I feel like such a bother. I'm sure not the Grandma I thought I would be. Here it is the day before, and I still don't know if I'm going.
My house is prepared for my husband to be comfy while I'm gone. Work clothes washed. Easy dinner foods in the cupboards. Half the battle seems to be won.
Ok, now I wait for the birthday girl to call me back. She shouldn't have to be worrying about where I'm sleeping on her birthday. I am so undecided all the time!!! I don't like it!!!
Well, I'm not going. I decided not to burden them. Thankfully I've got other things to focus on for the week so I wont feel too out of sorts. I will mail her a gift tomorrow. I made her a beautiful wrap bracelet. I hope she likes it as much as I do!
Ah L- kitty… I was so hoping you would go, sometimes we have to just take a leap of faith, knowing we will prob. Have to spent a lot of time recovering… Something’s are worth it , i thought the pop up trailer was a good option… maybe try for another time, I’m sure you feel relieved & disappointed all in one !!
I am going to be watching my 5 year old grandson for a whole week, I have had him over night before, but never for more than that, my daughter has taken a job, and the training starts the week he is on vacation… Before my daughter took the job she said the only way she could do it, is if for the 4 weeks I pick my grandson up from school everyday, so I couldn’t say no, but then we found out he starts his week off from school, the day she starts. I’m just going to take one day at a time and try and enjoy what I can. He is such a sweet heart, so I’m hoping my pain & energy can be in check the month of April … Oh boy
Hugs & blessings
dee
I owe you a letter from last week and will get to it. Meanwhile, you can be the best grandma that you can be simply by loving the grandkids and being there for them. Kids really don't need fancy outings or anything. They just want a grandma who loves them and pays attention to them.
I hope you're able to make it tomorrow. Of course, it'd be wonderful to see your grandkids and be there for your daughter's birthday. But please be sure that you're up to the drive. 150 miles over a mountain is a tall order for a fibroite. So please please make sure you're in good enough mental and physical shape to make it.
If you do, have a great time with your family! There's nothing like a face-to-face meeting with your loved ones.
Oops, just read that you're not going. How sad that you feel that you're burdening them when they're probably so happy to see you. I know my mom says that to me at times and it makes me feel bad because she won't believe me when I tell her otherwise. I wonder if it's the same with your daughter and you?
I'm sure she'll love the bracelet - jewelry is always so fun to wear.
You are so sweet to want to go and visit your daughter even though you may be in pain. As they say "It is the thought that counts." I have read many of your posts and I am sure your daughter understands and loves you no matter what. The grandbabies will understand too. Once the weather calms down you will probably be able to see them all more. If I had a grandma like you I would feel blessed as I am sure they do.
Don't feel like you are a burden for needing space in the future. Easier said than done :-) You are looking out for your best interest so you can have as much quality less pain hours to spend with all of them.
I am sure your daughter will love the bracelet and will be thinking great thoughts of you when she gets it.
Is there bus access from your place to your daughters? I have been thinking about that a lot as my mom lives 11 hours driving away which I used to always do on Christmas to see her but now I am going to take a plane and bus to get to her. Might be something you can do in the future.
So sorry that this has not turned out well for you! I know how much you love them! Hopefully in the future, they can be more open to you coming when you are well enough, without a special occasion.
I'm sure she will love the gift and the thought that you made it for her!
Sending a big hug your way, and hoping for it turning out better next time!
Whenever I have to take a drive like that, I always tell myself that there are motels along the way. I don’t know if that is an option your case. But for your grandkids they have a grandmother that does desire to take it in an effort to be with them mean so much. I’m going to tell you, that my daughter has a grandmother that really does not make much of an effort to see her at all.
It’s not that she doesn’t care, but she has fibro as well but it is wrapped up and consumed her life.
Understand that your daughter is your daughter and she loves you and doesn’t want to take care of you I’m sure don’t worry about being a bother to her don’t worry about being an inconvenience to her.
I can tell you that when the time came for me to have to take care of a parent, I was very glad to do so very thankful for the opportunity to show him the tear that he showed me. Would you please keep us updated on what you end up doing? If you do end up taking that drive, I would like to pray for you the whole way.
I don’t know how to edit my comment, but when I said your daughter does not want to take care of you I meant she does want to take care of you. I’m doing a voice to text thing right now on my phone and sometimes it really messes things up.
You are all so good. I really appreciate each of you. I'm going to go in a couple of weeks. It turns out that my daughter is really sick. She's glad I'm not exposing myself to that and I feel like I dodged a bullet.
You're right. I can't miss out on these years. I have love and hugs to give those little grands. I'm going to go in a couple of weeks. I'm warning them now, to have the trailer ready for Apple Grandma. (They call me that because my crazy dogs name is Apple).
