I am in pain 24/7. I can barely get out of bed in the morning. Ive been trying for over a year to convince myself that the feeling I have in the morning of being so sore that I dont want to move is common. That every other adult on the face of the earth feels the same thing every day. Ive been trying to convince myself that my lower body always hurts solely because im overweight. Ive been trying to blame my scatter brain on the fact that im a Mom, and I smoked WAY too much weed in college. Ive been telling myself that I stop doing things that I like, such as cooking big meals, because of my depression, when in reality its cuz I cant stand at the stove for long periods of time without my lower back starting to hurt.
I was diagnosed April 11th so really very recently. I went to the Rheumatologist to find out if I have lupus. (LONG story see my about me section) Instead he diagnosed me with Fibro. Sent me to get labs taken but has not yet made a plan for me. I am already on Anti-depressants 150mg Zoloft and Buspar for generalized anxiety disorder. So obviously if this is already the treatment and im still complaining of pain its not working. So I set out to understand all I could.
Now since I wanted to understand more of what exactly Fibromyalgia is, (not because im a glutton for punishment but because I feel more in control the more i know and understand) I am starting to put two and two together. Im going to my Rheumatologist on may 23rd and I plan to ask him these exact same questions but I wanted to ask some of you guys as well.
So Fibro. is a disorder of the musculoskeletal system. So thats bones and muscles I figured that one out on my own *wink* lol but the basis is a chemical imbalance in the brain and how the brain communicates pain to the spinal cord and vice versa. (Am I right so far?)
There is no cure. Only anti-depressants and meditation. Ok anti-depressants: Check! So what do I do now? Cuz I cant stay in this much pain every day. Right now sitting here in my computer chair is like an 8. In the morning it will be damn close to a 10.
Im just having a hard time accepting that there is nothing doctors can do. I cant be in this much pain and keep working the strenuous job that I do. (Im an LNA at a county nursing home.) But then if i dont work I dont have insurance for me and my husband. Both of us need my insurance in a very dire way. (he has hyperthyroidism and possible PSC.)
I would say that your work of lifting people is not doing you any good. I understand the situation that you are in, but sooner of later, your body will not allow it at all. Have you had a back x-ray lately where you are having the pain? Sounds like a good place to start to me, but I'm not the Doctor, you could ask for one if you think it's a good idea.
There is no cure, but there are levels of well being with everything. Be as good to yourself as you can, with the least amount of stress that you can.
I havent had an xray since 2010 when I was in a car accident, and broke my foot. It doesnt feel like bone pain to me. More like muscle pain. I threw my back out for the first time in my life a month or so ago and then threw it out at work again today. Or maybe just re-angered it lol. A resident lost her balance I threw the hand that wasnt holding onto her already around her other arm to stop her from hitting her head and back on the plumbing on the back of the toilet and her knees gave out and then I was just about on the floor next to her feet.
My job is a very strenuous job but I love every minute of it. (Weeeeeeelllll ALMOST every minute of it. I dont know anyone who enjoys another persons poop ^.^)
Ive thought about disability but i can still function at some capacity. I may not be as fast as the others and I may not be as organized because im so foggy but I can still do the job and do it in a semi timely manner with no restrictions.
Idk im just still trying to figure everything out. I hate to admit it because Im not this type of person but Ive gone through so much and never played the why me card but now im playing it and jumping up and down waving it. WHY ME! Havent I been kicked around enough? Can I get out of this like I would Jury duty? I want my own get out of pain free card! Ya know?!
Hang in there Girlz. Eventually you will find a balance, I'm told. At least we get close and get through it. There's comfort in numbers and you have picked the right place for those. Lots and lots of support and friends here to offer you ideas and support. I've only been here a few months and I can't leave. I need this support. They will have to boot me off to get me to go away. LOL!
You might start making a list of things you want to know from your rheum. I see SK has already suggested an x-ray might be helpful. I'm sure you will get some other helpful suggestions before your appointment.
Best wishes to you. You have a big load you're carrying. Take good care of yourself by not adding any additional stress right now.
You articulated how I feel absolutely perfectly. The anger and frustration with the lack of treatment options is hard to accept. I was diagnosed recently also, and it seems like a no win cycle. You have to get up and do what you do, that causes more pain, but you still have to get up and do it again the next day. On your days off, you try to recover, but you still have responsibilities so you don't get the rest you need, so the pain just builds on the previous pain. I hope you find some help, some people on here seem to have found understanding, helpful doctors, hopefully you will find that kind of doctor.
I spoke to my therapist today about everything going through my mind and my worries and she also suggested that I make a list for my rheumy. <-- new nickname as im sure we are going to be BFF's from now on. *rolls eyes*
She also suggested that I NOT do yoga hahaha she said that im such an outgoing person but I have a tendency to perseverate on the bad things when I have time to sit down and think. So she suggested warm water aerobics. So I think im going to look into joining the local YMCA just sucks that they are so expensive! Im in the higher end of the low income bracket so 100$ just to walk in the door for the first time is a bit steep for my families income. But that is for the hubbs and I and our two kids to go.
As of my last appt no treatment plan was made. He just diagnosed me and said go get labs drawn downstairs. Now I have a letter of what my lab levels were and a ton of questions mainly: What now?
Anyone have suggestions on what kind of questions I should ask? Like what I should know?
Im usually the one that people come to when they have health questions on their own because Im like a mini WebMD but in this instance im stumped. I dont know what to ask or where to turn next.
Hi Girl and welcome to our fibro club. You know, it's odd, I was just thinking today of how I used to do just as you do by denying that my exhaustion and pain were more than just a hard day at work. Nevermind that I got to the point where I couldn't move all weekend. And had no desire to get up to eat and no energy to live. Nor to get another job. It was all beyond my ability to do. Moving was beyond my ability. I sooooo know how you feel! And like you, I had a very physically active job. And that, my friend, is what was the catalyst to move my fibro from beyond the horrible pain in my back and into my hips, elbows and hands. Fibro LOVES busy, hard working women!!! Oh, yes it does! It'll keep at you and keep at you until you end up like me, without the energy to even go on. That is NOT a good place to end up. I would strongly encourage you to job search now, while you still are able to, and try to find something easier on you. I'm not going to lie - fibro will still devil you at work. But at least you'll feel some relief. Because from what I've observed, fibro seems to be progressive, no matter what official sites may say.
I have to give you a TON of credit for saving your resident from that hellacious fall. You may well have saved her life. But your body is also telling you, "uh uh," through the back injury and re-injury.
Since you're still functional and working, you can't apply for disability. But you'll know when you're getting there because things you could do before will get harder and harder and harder. My advice is to not wait until the bitter end to apply because the process can take anywhere from 6 months to 2-3 years, depending upon your case. And your fibro can change a lot over the course of several months. I know mine surely has! Maybe some people are more slow to progress and maybe some people stay the same. In that case, fantastic! But please put some serious thought into the "what if" aspect of your not being able to work anymore and try to come up with a plan of what you'll do in that case.
I have to add - I love your sense of humor! Maybe you could petition Monopoly to add a "Why Me?" card to their game, so you could grab it and use it at times. And you could even design what you think fibro would look like.
As for your back, you should get it x-rayed again. My pain doc found that I had arthritis in mine that was radiating down into my buttock, where it felt like muscle pain. Long story short, he burned some nerves in my back and that got rid of the pain in that area for about 8 months. The procedure was terribly painful for 3 weeks afterwards but then relief for several months!
I'm glad you've found us. It's a great place to be for friendship and some support.
1. What were the labs for? Probably checking to rule out auto-immune illnesses.
2. What were the lab results? Did he find a Vitamin D3 deficiency? Hypothyroidism? Auto-immune illnesses?
3. Do the lab numbers indicate that you may need to be retested in the future for these illnesses?
4. Do you need to take Vitamin D-3? If so, how much?
5. How does he intend to proceed from here, esp. since your pain meds aren't bringing your pain levels down?
6. Does he want you to see a rheumatologist for management of the fibro? What about a pain mgmt clinic? In addition to the nerve burning i had done there, I also got shots of cortisone in my knees, which helped until PT screwed them up again. (Actually me knee doc administered them but the pain clinic could have too.)
That's all I can think of for now. Maybe someone else will have some good suggestions to add to my list.
Yeah thats what I thought but I found out today that I most likely will be fired because I didnt use a gait belt to help with her transfer. When I have never seen one on her before. Gah!