Second attempt at JUST BEING POSITIVE! (Where the 1st one went I have no CLUE)!

General
1

This is actually probably good it occurred b/c it has me laughing and poking fun at the huge dork I am so as I am having a ridiculously difficult time navigating this amazing website. So I had my initial discussion called "Just Being Postive" and in it, I said that I am here, 2am in front of my computer when I should be working on my research paper but right now, this is far more important: I have felt so crummy crap-cakes for the last 2 days and I'm stuck in pity party mode, whereas I w?ant to cry in bed, or sleep in it all day (no-go, I have a 3 1/2 yr old daughter at home who needs mama's attention NOW!) I'm sure so many of you can relate to this.

So my original post on just being positive, really my own resolve and wanting to know if any of you are in a place where you can join in and share something, however small it may be, that you know would be encouraging to yourself first and foremost, but also, would it do the same for others in this group?

I just know that NOW is a time that I've come to where I'm tired of always being "whoa is me"; I have a whole family and kids to take care of so climbing into a closet to hide is not an option, nor is running out the front door, never to return! What motivated me is my kids, not myself sadly. That's that ole' self pity rearing it's head but I am done and this post IS NOT going into the "down day/rants" discussion because enough is enough (for me). I cannot continue to sit and simmer in what I'm understanding as a very destructive disease, in that there are no magic pills that cure all of the ailments that come along with FM

So, make this long (uh, does it look like a rant? please say it ain't so :) story short now: what helps YOU and YOU and YOU, ALL OF YOU who care to answer, what do you do when you're at your most positive frame of mind. I know I KNOW it's rare, I get it! I've been debby downer as my husband often calls me for days and I feel really crummy icky yuk but I can't have this depressing demeanor day after day!

JO, you said that a sense of humor goes a long way and a few more of you who chimed in definately agreed on that. JO, you also said to put on a smile, because not only does it make you feel better but it makes everyone around you feel good too. And your advice was profound to me. It's after 2am now and I'm smiling to no one in particular and it DOES make me feel better (even if only briefly)

Thanks for that JO, that was some awesome advice and I'm gonna try it on the 1st person to wake up in my house, probably the husband who'll likely think I'm a super weirdo but I don't care. I'm following your advice and putting on the front because I've spent due time feeling sorry for myself and that's over for now :)

So sorry if I did ramble, I have now been working on an English research paper for about 4 1/2hrs for school and I'm weary. Maybe that's why I can't navigate this darn site so well (weariness!) Or perhaps it is just me now that we can all see this HUGE BOLD text going on that I have no idea how to fix, darn I am just trying to communicate with new friends here Sheesh!!! :)Tomorrow I'm going to get up early, weather will be nice and my 3 1/2 yr old daughter are going to go for a walk to the park where I'm going to help her chase some butterflies, probably run from some bees "because bees STIIIIING moma" according to Mya. But this will be unusual for us but nonetheless super enjoyable and beneficial for us both! I'm ready to turn the lights and music off at the pity party, go out there tomorrow & find something that brings me joy despite the stiffness and pain. This will probably be the sight of her chasing after any bunny allowing her to get close enough to discover him or her whilst screaming "bunny, don't be afraid, I just have carrots for you. Bunny! Come Back Here!!!"

See how much it take to have some positive moments? Sorry for the ramble, I just wanted to have a laugh at myself and smile to no one in particular b/c feeling so depressed about this is gettin old baby!

Melissa

2

Hi Melissa,

What works for me? I wake up every morning and try to think of 3 things that are blessings in my life. My daughter is always on my list. I am so thankful for having a roof over my head too ;). If that doesn't work I take a "walk in other people's shoes". I realize there are many people who have far worse problems than I do. I don't have cancer or any life threatening disease, I live in a place where I have access to decent health care, and I have people who love me. These are all things I am grateful for. Gentle hugs help too ;). Its hard staying positive but looking at all I've lost thanks to FMS takes me to a very dark place that I don't want to be.

I hope this helps. Give that baby girl a big hug (gently of course) and blow bubbles with her!

Nancy

3

wow! I have a lot of guilt...because of a lot of high expectations of myself. I'm a perfectionist by nature (house needs to be cleaned, kids spent time with, dinner ready, so on and so forth...) I love that you say that about your husband; if he can give up another year for your freedom, you can give up something. This illness/disease makes me a selfish person b/c I really am so wrapped up in how I am feeling. And I realize, when you say that, that it's so important to think outside of yourself, about someone else. And that actually helps to lessen the physical pain, I find, because it shows the people in your life that you're not only thinking of you. I'm trying to do that very thing now as well. Today is the 3rd day of this flare--up and it's particularly bad. I have not had one for months. And it is so difficult to focus on anything but the burning aching pain but I have to find a distraction and not focus on it so much. So daughter and I are still going outside today as it's lovely out there. And I am still going to be positive and not get caught up in this self pity thing. Thanks for your replies! I will remember to "walk in someone else's shoes" today (thanks for that advice) and count my blessings instead of concentrating on being miserable :)

Have a wonderful day!

4

I am (62) B DAY the 28> I have been LIving with Fybro far longer then time I have been told I have IT.

FInd a balance in your live Do only what you can with out over doing.

FInd what makes it flar up and let someone else do the job IE use automatic carwash insted of doing it by hand or a wand a the carwash = less eforte less pain. it might be carring in the grocerys take small loads, balance in each hand , slow and easy. I have always been the kind to do it hard and fast as if you were impressing some one or get it done so you can do more. slowing down AND LETTING OTHERS HELP WITH HARD TASKS THAT HARM OR HURT YOUR BODY (SOME TIMES) IS BEST

THINKING POSITIVE IS ALWAYS GOOD. But the truth is I can only do so much is also very important.

IE if asked how are you doing? IE we will say good! and realy mean how am i going to get this all done with My pain and fybro fog. not to complan can be the same as not ammiting that we/you can only do so much.

I do belive that smiling and thinking positive Helps us get through the day having a plan that works is more importent IE DIet,extra size ( MY SPELLING ) , limits to how fast and far. knowing when depresion is the negative thoughts tring to get you to balance your life and not do to much. YES I know that there is not just one simple answere to the problems of FYBRO.

FInding what works for you IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING.

It is true some time saying/thinking = I can, I can, I can OR I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN are toldly diferrent

I will do this as best I can and at a pace that works for Me/YOU is the, Positve Thought, way to work at it.

5

Aloha Melissa: First of all, don't be so hard on yourself about rambling on. Second, do not feel guilty about being in a self-pitty-mood, depressed, wanting to cry/yell, or just wanting to sleep the whole day away. With the excruciating pain that we have to endure each and everyday, anyone would be pissed.

This is what helps me. I wake up every morning and look over at my husband who has been a wonderful, supportive partner through these last 3 years. Then, I look at my kitty, Nimmie Gurl, who is just as adorable as can be and I cuddle her (maybe you should get a cat!). Then, I look out my window. I am lucky to live in Hawaii and I live in a condo with a beautiful view of the ocean.These are the things that put a smile on my face. Then...........I try to get out of bed and I can hardly walk to the bathroom; somehow I make it, then off to the kitchen to make coffee and take my medications. Within an hour or so, the meds kick in and I feel a little better. The pain is always there, but it is not as excruciating.

When I get really down, I think of other people who are have worse issues. If you really want to feel better, you should watch on U-Tube this wonderful individual, Nick, the man who has no limbs, yet, he is able, with his strength, belief in God, and his incredible positive attitude, has done over 1000 speeches encouraging people that there are no limits to what you can do. This man even surfs! Just unbelievable!!!

Okay, for laughs, I watch on U-Tube, Sylvester, the Talking Cat. Even if you are not a cat person, you will love it. It is so funny, you will forget about your pain. Also, watch comedians - I love this Greek comedian; I can't think of his name right now, but I will find out and get back to you with his name.

Next, for exercise. We need to do something. For me, it is the pool. If you have one in your area, you should check it out, but be sure it is a heated pool. Once you get in the water, you will feel no pain! You are weightless and can swim, or go go back and forth and stretch all your muscles. The weather is getting nicer and so, you should be outdoors and enjoy the sunshine, even if you just sit in a park and people-watch.

For a long time,I too, was in a self-pitty mood. It was getting harder and harder for me to walk (my pain is in my lower back and legs) and so, I mostly stayed home feeling sorry for myself. My husband bought me a cane. At first, I did not want to use it, but it helped with my balance. That was okay for awhile, but then I fell, so I felt I needed a mobility device. I rented a scooter for a month to see how that would be. Oh, my goodness, FREEDOM! It has made all the difference in the world. Now, I can get out more, do some shopping, and even just take a book and find a nice shady spot to read and relax.

I worked for a lawfirm for 34 years, but after forcing myself for 2 years to continue working, I just could not do it anymore. Now, I only work 5 hours a week. It is good for me. It allows me to get up, get dressed and go out. I am not a legal assistant anymore, I just help out with non-stressful tasks.

So, tomorrow when you wake up, don't think of it as just another day in your life. It's not just another day in your life, it's the only day that is given to you today. It is given to you as a gift, it is the only gift that you have right now and the only appropriate response is gratefulness. If you treat this day as it were the first day of your life and the very last day, then you will have spent this day very well. These last couple of sentences I wrote is taken from a man named Louie Schwarzbeg, on Gratitude, another U-Tube video you should listen to.

Also, there are support groups out there, like this one which is on-line, but I also found one in my area, where people with fibro get together once a month and discuss their problems. At first, I didn't want to be around a bunch of people who were all whining and complaining about their symptoms, but then I thought, try it, so I went. It was very supportive and you were finally around people who understood really what you are going through. We could all share our stories, discuss what might help, and just talk about what you are going through, and, yes, ramble, but it is a good way of sharing ideas and maybe give suggestions of what works for you.

Okay, that's my story. Hope some of these ideas might help. You look young and are very pretty. So, go, get out there with a smile and smile at a stranger, they will smile back!

Good luck.

Loraie Trenz

6

Melissa.

Are you on any meds for your depression?
That might be a first step.
Do you have any family or friends sho can help with daily chores?
You need supportive people around you.
I used to work full tome but I know I can’t.So I don’t do it
anymore.Its harder with out a big pay check but at least I’m not
forcing myself to do something I can’t.
I can’t imagine raising kids with FM.
More power to you.You have to come up with strategies to do things when you have the energy.
Joann

7

Wanted to give you the names of the people I mentioned in my reply below. The inspirational speaker, Nick Vujicic, will help you get through your road for being positive. He has reached out to many people and has touched their lives.

The comedian I mentioned is Angelo Tsarouchas. Trust me, you will laugh and forget your pain for awhile.

Both can be viewed on U-Tube. Just put in their names, sit down, relax and enjoy!

Aloha said:

Aloha Melissa: First of all, don't be so hard on yourself about rambling on. Second, do not feel guilty about being in a self-pitty-mood, depressed, wanting to cry/yell, or just wanting to sleep the whole day away. With the excruciating pain that we have to endure each and everyday, anyone would be pissed.

This is what helps me. I wake up every morning and look over at my husband who has been a wonderful, supportive partner through these last 3 years. Then, I look at my kitty, Nimmie Gurl, who is just as adorable as can be and I cuddle her (maybe you should get a cat!). Then, I look out my window. I am lucky to live in Hawaii and I live in a condo with a beautiful view of the ocean.These are the things that put a smile on my face. Then...........I try to get out of bed and I can hardly walk to the bathroom; somehow I make it, then off to the kitchen to make coffee and take my medications. Within an hour or so, the meds kick in and I feel a little better. The pain is always there, but it is not as excruciating.

When I get really down, I think of other people who are have worse issues. If you really want to feel better, you should watch on U-Tube this wonderful individual, Nick, the man who has no limbs, yet, he is able, with his strength, belief in God, and his incredible positive attitude, has done over 1000 speeches encouraging people that there are no limits to what you can do. This man even surfs! Just unbelievable!!!

Okay, for laughs, I watch on U-Tube, Sylvester, the Talking Cat. Even if you are not a cat person, you will love it. It is so funny, you will forget about your pain. Also, watch comedians - I love this Greek comedian; I can't think of his name right now, but I will find out and get back to you with his name.

Next, for exercise. We need to do something. For me, it is the pool. If you have one in your area, you should check it out, but be sure it is a heated pool. Once you get in the water, you will feel no pain! You are weightless and can swim, or go go back and forth and stretch all your muscles. The weather is getting nicer and so, you should be outdoors and enjoy the sunshine, even if you just sit in a park and people-watch.

For a long time,I too, was in a self-pitty mood. It was getting harder and harder for me to walk (my pain is in my lower back and legs) and so, I mostly stayed home feeling sorry for myself. My husband bought me a cane. At first, I did not want to use it, but it helped with my balance. That was okay for awhile, but then I fell, so I felt I needed a mobility device. I rented a scooter for a month to see how that would be. Oh, my goodness, FREEDOM! It has made all the difference in the world. Now, I can get out more, do some shopping, and even just take a book and find a nice shady spot to read and relax.

I worked for a lawfirm for 34 years, but after forcing myself for 2 years to continue working, I just could not do it anymore. Now, I only work 5 hours a week. It is good for me. It allows me to get up, get dressed and go out. I am not a legal assistant anymore, I just help out with non-stressful tasks.

So, tomorrow when you wake up, don't think of it as just another day in your life. It's not just another day in your life, it's the only day that is given to you today. It is given to you as a gift, it is the only gift that you have right now and the only appropriate response is gratefulness. If you treat this day as it were the first day of your life and the very last day, then you will have spent this day very well. These last couple of sentences I wrote is taken from a man named Louie Schwarzbeg, on Gratitude, another U-Tube video you should listen to.

Also, there are support groups out there, like this one which is on-line, but I also found one in my area, where people with fibro get together once a month and discuss their problems. At first, I didn't want to be around a bunch of people who were all whining and complaining about their symptoms, but then I thought, try it, so I went. It was very supportive and you were finally around people who understood really what you are going through. We could all share our stories, discuss what might help, and just talk about what you are going through, and, yes, ramble, but it is a good way of sharing ideas and maybe give suggestions of what works for you.

Okay, that's my story. Hope some of these ideas might help. You look young and are very pretty. So, go, get out there with a smile and smile at a stranger, they will smile back!

Good luck.

Loraie Trenz

8

I think I am happy I have a housekeeper once a month. I am happy I have my aunt once a week who does the laundry, changes the bed, and other chores too hard for me that the housekeeper does not do. I think how happy I am that my parents encouraged my brother and me go to college so that I have a pension and don't have to worry so much about money all the time. I am very thankful to have a wonderful man find me. My manfriend takes care of me as well as a nurse. I have a lot of health problems, and he tackles each one. My family loves me. My dogs sleep with me and move as I move!

I look back to my past and smile. I used to be a private pilot and had many exciting experiences. Remembering that first solo, flying for the FAA Instructor, getting my license, and coming back to my home airport and celebrating. There were only 2 female pilots-an instructor and me. She was a high school classmate. A little sadness comes now because of all the meds I can't get my medical. They can't take my license, but they can turn down your medical.

The first time I held my nephew-Wow! I am paying for part of his college now. He makes me happy. He is making the highest grade in almost every class and getting awards, certificates, and trophies.

I have a lot to be happy for, but I still hurt like hell a lot of the times. I seem not to have flares but to hurt all the time; however, I do not know whether that is all the fibro or a combo of it and some of my other diseases. I have my days of sleeping all day, fibro fog, fetal position pain, not getting out for weeks. Fun for me is staying in contact with students and classmates on FB, being politically and socially active online, and texting my brother.

Keep your head up. We all have our own ways. And each day is different and each the same.

9

Hi Melissa, Please give yourself some credit !!!! having a 3 year old, and writing a research paper are two very difficult things especially for someone with fibro. I was in school for 3 years just prior to my diagnosis of fibro and I can tell you there is no way I could do it now. I also have a a 4 year old grandson and I cant even keep him all night, actually my 70 year old mother can spend more time with him than I can, although I do still work about 27 hrs a week that's all I can do. No social life at all, a man just asked me for my phone number today and like I have done for the past 4 years I just turned him down. I would love to have a partner, but then I think as soon as I have to keep saying I cant do this or I cant do that... whats the point, but like everyone has said we just have to find what can make us happy, and be thankful for what we have. As a health care provider I can assure you there are people who live with far worse things.There are So many MS patients that cant move any part of their body, and they just deteriorate. My brother is on lung transplant list because he has suffered with Cystic Fibrosis his whole like, and my other brother is in liver failure, both in there 40's, but I have seen how God is good and we can get strength through him. Praise and gratitude result in happiness its just a matter telling your self over and over what you have to be grateful for. Sounds like your daughter brings you joy,give her a gentle hug and kiss,I would do anything to have my daughter that age again. They grow to fast, my daughter is 28 and I am so thankful she is the one person in my life who kinda understands my fibro. Good luck with your English class, take it one day at a time school can be way to stressful

hope this helps and I loved reading you story

dee

10

You are being way too hard on yourself....go get those donuts =:)

Maria

ariestlt said:

Just a clarification, it's a boyfriend, not husband. Yet....lol. Him going does cause me to change my view on things. When he's gone I HAVE to be happy and cheery when I talk to him or email him. He's got enough to worry about where he's going so worrying about me isn't an option and I won't allow it. I try to wake up in the morning and think about what he's going through and it makes my life not so bad at the moment.

I used to beat myself up constantly when I didn't get something done. THAT was causing me more stress which was causing more pain. And yes, I used to be the perfectionist too. It took some doing but I got over that. It's not a big deal if I didn't put the dishes in the dishwasher or didn't put my shoes away. There are some things that MUST be done every weekend (like the laundry and ironing my work clothes). So that gets done first and if I have the energy, I'll do the rest.

Today is a really high pain day for me. I got a $10 gift card for dunkin donuts for my birthday the other day and am SO tempted to go get a few donuts.... I'm self-justifying that he hasn't left yet...... and I haven't had any sweets since Easter when I gave them up. I might just have to go for some today. Now THAT is causing guilt.

11

Hi Melissa,

You have received some good advice. I agree with the others: do only what u can, listen to your body-if that means going to bed at 8pm, so be it. I do not work, have kids or a husband so I can relate to pity parties. Not to say I have no blessings in my life, because I do: great family and friends, great kitty cats, opportunities to try new things with all the free time I have. But, i believe there is a balance in the think positive thoughts concept. I believe you NEED to feel and express the negative as well. When I am in pain, thinking positive helps little. What I do is journal on my feelings and use the tools I have picked up over the years in support groups. Get as much education as you can on the illness. I have a book called Fibromyalgia :The complete guide by Dr. Marc Pelligrino who is an internist and a fibro sufferer. Also, there is a book called, "Chronic Illness and the 12 Steps" by Martha Cleveland. This book has helped me very much in identifying my emotions.

One thing that does seem to work on bad days is to sing out loud. I sing to my cats and it actually lifts my spirits.

God Bless

Maria

12

You can also befriend Nick on facebook. He is such a wonderful guy.

Aloha said:

Wanted to give you the names of the people I mentioned in my reply below. The inspirational speaker, Nick Vujicic, will help you get through your road for being positive. He has reached out to many people and has touched their lives.

The comedian I mentioned is Angelo Tsarouchas. Trust me, you will laugh and forget your pain for awhile.

Both can be viewed on U-Tube. Just put in their names, sit down, relax and enjoy!

Aloha said:

Aloha Melissa: First of all, don't be so hard on yourself about rambling on. Second, do not feel guilty about being in a self-pitty-mood, depressed, wanting to cry/yell, or just wanting to sleep the whole day away. With the excruciating pain that we have to endure each and everyday, anyone would be pissed.

This is what helps me. I wake up every morning and look over at my husband who has been a wonderful, supportive partner through these last 3 years. Then, I look at my kitty, Nimmie Gurl, who is just as adorable as can be and I cuddle her (maybe you should get a cat!). Then, I look out my window. I am lucky to live in Hawaii and I live in a condo with a beautiful view of the ocean.These are the things that put a smile on my face. Then...........I try to get out of bed and I can hardly walk to the bathroom; somehow I make it, then off to the kitchen to make coffee and take my medications. Within an hour or so, the meds kick in and I feel a little better. The pain is always there, but it is not as excruciating.

When I get really down, I think of other people who are have worse issues. If you really want to feel better, you should watch on U-Tube this wonderful individual, Nick, the man who has no limbs, yet, he is able, with his strength, belief in God, and his incredible positive attitude, has done over 1000 speeches encouraging people that there are no limits to what you can do. This man even surfs! Just unbelievable!!!

Okay, for laughs, I watch on U-Tube, Sylvester, the Talking Cat. Even if you are not a cat person, you will love it. It is so funny, you will forget about your pain. Also, watch comedians - I love this Greek comedian; I can't think of his name right now, but I will find out and get back to you with his name.

Next, for exercise. We need to do something. For me, it is the pool. If you have one in your area, you should check it out, but be sure it is a heated pool. Once you get in the water, you will feel no pain! You are weightless and can swim, or go go back and forth and stretch all your muscles. The weather is getting nicer and so, you should be outdoors and enjoy the sunshine, even if you just sit in a park and people-watch.

For a long time,I too, was in a self-pitty mood. It was getting harder and harder for me to walk (my pain is in my lower back and legs) and so, I mostly stayed home feeling sorry for myself. My husband bought me a cane. At first, I did not want to use it, but it helped with my balance. That was okay for awhile, but then I fell, so I felt I needed a mobility device. I rented a scooter for a month to see how that would be. Oh, my goodness, FREEDOM! It has made all the difference in the world. Now, I can get out more, do some shopping, and even just take a book and find a nice shady spot to read and relax.

I worked for a lawfirm for 34 years, but after forcing myself for 2 years to continue working, I just could not do it anymore. Now, I only work 5 hours a week. It is good for me. It allows me to get up, get dressed and go out. I am not a legal assistant anymore, I just help out with non-stressful tasks.

So, tomorrow when you wake up, don't think of it as just another day in your life. It's not just another day in your life, it's the only day that is given to you today. It is given to you as a gift, it is the only gift that you have right now and the only appropriate response is gratefulness. If you treat this day as it were the first day of your life and the very last day, then you will have spent this day very well. These last couple of sentences I wrote is taken from a man named Louie Schwarzbeg, on Gratitude, another U-Tube video you should listen to.

Also, there are support groups out there, like this one which is on-line, but I also found one in my area, where people with fibro get together once a month and discuss their problems. At first, I didn't want to be around a bunch of people who were all whining and complaining about their symptoms, but then I thought, try it, so I went. It was very supportive and you were finally around people who understood really what you are going through. We could all share our stories, discuss what might help, and just talk about what you are going through, and, yes, ramble, but it is a good way of sharing ideas and maybe give suggestions of what works for you.

Okay, that's my story. Hope some of these ideas might help. You look young and are very pretty. So, go, get out there with a smile and smile at a stranger, they will smile back!

Good luck.

Loraie Trenz

13

I LOVE THIS POST.

You make me want to do everything I can to get out of this "woe is me" attitude I've had for way too long. I don't have any answers, but you've given me some things to think about, and I really needed that !

Thank You Melissa !!!

Huge Hugs !

Renie ♥

14



Renie said:

I LOVE THIS POST.

You make me want to do everything I can to get out of this "woe is me" attitude I've had for way too long. I don't have any answers, but you've given me some things to think about, and I really needed that !

Thank You Melissa !!!

Huge Hugs !

Renie ♥

Aloha:

That's great! There are a lot of things out there that you can do. I've done tons of research on fibro so I know what I'm dealing with and even suggest things to my doctor.

After re-reading my message, I was thinking about what people might think, oh, right, she lives in Hawaii, of course your not depressed. Well, that's not true. It does not matter where you live or how much money you have when you are dealing with fibro. At times, I do not want to get out of bed or see anybody. Even doing a simple task, like getting the mail or washing dishes, is too hard. Believe it or not, I do not even go to the beach.

For me, I feel like I need to take a lot of breaks. If and when I feel okay, I do a little at a time. Even though I only work 5 hours a week, there are times that I can't make it in.

The scooter has made a big difference. I didn't go out because I had so much pain walking; it wasn't worth it, so I stayed home, just sleeping, on the computer and my watching my cat, Nimmie Gurl; she kept me company.

I feel like I appreciate life more now. Whenever I feel okay, I am so happy and relieved. Every once in awhile God gives me a break. I thank God every night for my husband, friends, Nimmie Gurl.

Hopefully, one of these days they will find a cure for this horrible illness. I have tried so many prescription medicine and nothing seems to work. Right now, I am on Gabapentin and it is a little better. I feel okay in the morning, then by 3-4PM I need to take a nap.

Try to find a support group in your area; that really helps. Also, read the book by R.Paul St. Amand, M.D. entitled "What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Fibromyalgia." Very informative. He and his wife had fibro and he did a lot of research. He created a protocol. If you can follow his advice, it may work for you. When I went to the support group, some ladies tried it and it worked for them. If you have the determination to follow it, it makes sense, but you have to avoid ALL salicylates which are in a lot of products we use, like make-up, deodorant, soaps etc. There are only 2 companies that sell salicylate-free products. I had to buy all new make up, toothpaste, even gum! So, it takes a lot of patience and money, but the doctor does not have fibro anymore and he has a clinic in California. I tried it for awhile, but it just got too expensive to keep it up. If you are not 100% salicilate-free you will block and it won't work.

Anyway, keep busy, be around people, go to the pool and try to enjoy each and everyday!

Aloha

15

Yes, I am on Cymbalta for depression/FM and have been since Dec. I've gone up on the dose and feel like it's pretty beneficial about 90% of the time. The other 10%: when I'm having a flare-up of pain, gastric distress, etc...etc....and things look quite bleak during that time!

irishroots said:

Melissa.

Are you on any meds for your depression?
That might be a first step.
Do you have any family or friends sho can help with daily chores?
You need supportive people around you.
I used to work full tome but I know I can't.So I don't do it
anymore.Its harder with out a big pay check but at least I'm not
forcing myself to do something I can't.
I can't imagine raising kids with FM.
More power to you.You have to come up with strategies to do things when you have the energy.
Joann
16

Renie I am THRILLED that this helped you!! Sometimes just laughing at yourself and being a kid again provides enough of a distraction! I refuse REFUSE to allow myself to wallow in this. (and I am NOT a positive person by any stretch of the imagination!) But...reading posts here, I realize that many of you are bed-ridden, suffer from so much pain that you cannot sleep at night, have IBS or other digestive issues so badly that you can't be far from a toilet, or have other complications/health issues ON TOP of this diagnosis so far be it from me to sit here and whine about this. Yes, I give myself credit (probably not often enough) and yes, I allow myself to be miserable and sometimes even cry because I feel so terrible physically but I always try to keep in mind that someone else is suffering so much more than I am. And I notice, having this attitude, trying to be a little positive, trying to be grateful that my situation is not as bad as that of so many others, it does help to reduce the pain physically.

Last week, when I posted that even though I wasn't feeling so great, my daughter and I would still be going outdoors....we went. And wouldn't you know, when we got a couple blocks down the street on our way to the park, I started to have a muscle spasm in my back!! It was made worse by the walking. But could you imagine me turning her stroller around, "honey I'm so sorry but we have to go back home because mommy doesn't feel good"...no way! And so here I am, a hot mess at the playground; it's spring so my nose is running, my eyes are watering, I'm sneezing and now I've got a muscle spasm to boot! But ya know what? We made it to that darn park! Yep, and we played (well, she played and I sat on the bench!) but we did what we set out to do. I'm so blessed that I have the ability to do that, that my pain isin't so terrible that I can't force my way through it.
I only hope that this does not progress over the coming years (another question I have about FM).
Renie said:

I LOVE THIS POST.

You make me want to do everything I can to get out of this "woe is me" attitude I've had for way too long. I don't have any answers, but you've given me some things to think about, and I really needed that !

Thank You Melissa !!!

Huge Hugs !

Renie ♥

17

Hope you paper is finished or going well. If you are feeling better with Cymbalta, that is great. You have not been on it that long so you could still improve with it or combine maybe with something for anxiety? I just detect some in your voice.
If I had a 3 yr old, going through school well,it would be difficult. Sick? Almost impossible. I admire you. I never had children, always too sick. I did finish post grad work but was sick a lot. I worked for benefits, and I have them.

I find pleasure in being at home away from stressors, toxic people, getting to go to bathroom when I want, eat and drink when I want, watch tv, sleep anytime, get out occasionally when I can or want, and getting to see my doctors as I need to. In other words, it feels good to take care of me. When able, I do something for my manfriend like cook in a crockpot. He is very understanding.

I hope you find what works. I am getting ready to have an endoscope. My stomach disease is acting up again. Hope yours feels better soon.

18

I'm so glad you made it to the park !! That alone is a great accomplishment. Not only physically, but your great attitude. Many people would have turned around. Kudos to you!
Regardless of what is wrong with a person, they are going to have their bad days. It's normal for any human to have a little pity-party. Some of us take it too far, and some not enough. There is always someone much worse off than us, and I feel guilty, so now I need to get myself to actually do something about it.

As for progression; it really depends on who you ask. Some Doctors say yes, some say no. I think it does, maybe not the disorder itself as much, but the normal aging process and changes in our lives. Arthritis, blood pressure, stress....it's all going to make us physically and mentally feel worse. Layer that with Fibro, and it might be hard to decipher the actual cause of the symptom. I'm 45, and I think I've had this since I was a kid=I have definitely gotten worse the past 3 years. BUT: I have bad osteoporosis, and 6 herniated discs in my neck and low spine. My worst complaint is physical pain in my hip, and I can't stand still more than a few minutes -- but I know it comes from my spine. Burning in my feet? Probably the discs too, because it's Neurological. The numbness in my hands is also Neuro.
Mentally, my "Fibro Fog" has gotten really bad the past few years...but I quit my job when all this started. So I get depressed being home,not working; I don't have to focus on anything like I do at work...so I think that attributes to it.

I think you've got the best answer: Laughing at yourself, acting like a kid, having a sense of humor, and realizing there are so many other people who have it so much worse, is going to take you a long way. Keeping your mind busy- like you are writing a paper, being involved in groups like this to be proactive about our own healthcare, and having a good doctor that works with us -- I bet the good days will definitely outnumber the bad.

Melissa, you are a great writer--I hope you keep writing things like this for us!

Hugs !

Renie ♥

19

Does anyone else have high cholesterol with the FM?
I’m already on a low carb diet.How much more can I stop eating?
I refuse to go on more meds.

20

Hi, I don't have high cholesterol personally but I hear you on the no more meds thing for sure! It's difficult to restrict carbs and I don't blame you for how you feel. What about exercise to lower it? Are you able to do that, even walking could be beneficial, of course, if you have the capability for that. Good luck. I would look to more natural methods to reduce it.

Take care!