I first want to say I’am sorry I have not been on in a while this is my M.O I shut down and shut everything out, I’am just really having a hard time dealing with my health then my granddaughters death then my grandson being in the hospital he is doing better then he was having no support my other half all he wants is for me to take care of him and the kids, so tired by the time it’s night and everyone is sleeping I’am to tired and in pain to write or type and now my other half let his daughter and her husband and four kids and dogs live with us because again they are homeless he doesn’t care how it affects me also got into an accident at work thank God no one was with me just lost the life I had and going down worse and worse .i hope you all are doing better I do think about you’ll a lot hugs,melissa
I am sorry you are having such a hard time, Sending hugs your way.
Melissa - I am so very sorry. I withdraw when times are hard as well. The worse I feel, the more I close myself off. It is so good that you have reconnected - I know the support here will help you through all of this. You have had a really rough time and it is understandable that you would be having problems during this time. Even a very healthy person would have trouble with the loss of a Grandchild. I am so very sorry. Sending big hugs and prayers that you will feel some relief very soon and find the love and support you need during this time.
Be kind to yourself.
Linnie
Mel I’m so sorry life has been so hard… It’s hard enough feeling horrible and then to have to deal with all that you are , oh my goodness women !!! But I’m so glad you are at least checking in, I sure do understand the whole shut down and shut everyone out …thing, I do the same thing 
my family knows if I don’t call or answer my phone it usually means I just don’t feel good and it’s sometimes easier to just be left alone.
Just know we care ! We are thinking about you and hope you can get some relief . Stress only makes things that much harder…I know you know that
Be kind to yourself
We miss you
Hugs & blessings
dee B
Hey Mel, you know you have friends here
I’m really sorry you are going through such a bad time again, it never seems to end for you. I know it’s easy for me to say, but you really need to get support in changing the situation. Can you hide yourself away and phone the help line on the front page of the forum or is there some local support agency you could get counseling from, it really sounds like you need professional counseling and grief support. As well there are many types of abuse and battering not just physical but also mental
Your house sounds really chaotic, if there are two more adults in the house it seems reasonable, to me anyhow, that they take on the housework and cooking, and give you some time to rest.
I was glad to hear you were working again because I know you liked your job but am sorry you had an accident, are you okay?
I understand the need to withdraw from the situation, but please seek professional help to support you, and help you both with your grief and the situation which is affecting you. You need to remember you are a brave, compassionate person and you don’t deserve this, you deserve to have a supportive environment where you can deal with your health issues.
Please look after yourself, and treat yourself well.
Lots of hugs
Hi Melissa,
I am so sorry to hear about your loss and that your grandson is in the hospital! It sounds like a very stressful time for you and I know that stress can cause flare ups which of course doesn't help the situation. Please remember to take care of yourself and find some time to rest. The people staying with you are not your guests and don't need you to entertain them or feed them so please don't feel like you have to do that, I agree with the other comment that they should be helping with the cleaning and maintaining the house and I think it would be reasonable of them to have to cook you meals some times.
Please take care
Hugs, Allison
Thank you for all your support I have no choice today but be flat on my back I can’t move today the pain is at it’s worst migraine wont stop and all the goes on all day is kids screaming I’am in my room and every so often my other alf comes in to see when am I getting out of bed I have things to do I told him I can’t no possible way dealing with being sick and everything else I just wish I had someone to care .i do have an amazing son who try’s to help me but he is going to college my angel I feel better going on this web sight your all such great people love you all hugs melissa
Oh my goodness lady, you are definitely going through a very tough time. Sending hugs and prayers your way.
Oh Mel!
My heart aches for you, my friend! I hope things will settle for you some day soon! We're here any time!
Love and hugs,
SK
Melissa, I can so relate. I was in the same situation just the last week and half. I ran out of my Cymbalta on a Thursday and was not to see dr till Tues. Oh my God, I will never let that happen again, was having all kind of thoughts that I knew I had never had, just wanted to be by myself so I could collect my thoughts, and sleep sleep sleep and sleep. Thank God got my Cymbalta and its been back in my system for a few days and I am starting to feel much better. Maybe need to speak with your doc about adding something to help with the depression.
*hugs*, I know how you are feeling my dear... I have just put a blog post on about depression. If you ever need to talk just message me and I will get back to you xxx
Thanks Mike, u will probly being hearing from me
Look forward to it :) xx