Good Morning my name is Kimberly

I’m not really sure where to begin because there is so much I need to talk about. I have Hashimoto Thyroiditis an autoimmune disease, then Thyroid Cancer (2 years remission), and now Fibro. I’m a 33 year old mother of 2 and I feel worthless. None of the treatments are working aside from smoking medical marijuana not for the cbd pain relief but for the psychoactive effects because it is the only way I can find some comfort. My life is literally just ticking by and all I can do is sit around and watch. I’ve tried everything and nothing is working. I have each symptom of all my conditions and they are severe. I’m a burden to my family and the thought of waking up each morning is so dreadful to me. I don’t know how much longer I can deal with this, it hurts so much all the time. I don’t even remember what a good day felt like. How do I make myself get through this when my faith and hope for relief is gone?

Hi Kimberly,

I am fairly new to this fibro support group but your post caught my eye as you stated you are 33 years old. I am also 33 and a mother of 3 boys and 2 Girls. I do not have other co-existing diagnosis such as your Hashimoto’s and Cancer. First, I am so happy to hear you are in remission. I am also a Hospice nurse and have been taking care of hospice patients for about 7 years now. I can’t even begin to imagine all of your diagnosis put together most definitely makes for a painful experience. My Fibro as well has been flaring up what seems like constantly off and on for the past 3 months; this is the worst pain I’ve experienced. This is also my first time trying a med regimen; taking Robaxin 500mg 1-2 tabs about twice a day. Doc says I can take every 4 hours up to 3-4000mg/day but I’m NOT a big medication person so I only take it about once a day; and end the day with a Naproxen 500mg to ease me down and help me to sleep. Lets say its been barely tolerable with the new meds and my episodes seem to worsen. I DO agree with you that the pain sometimes so debilitating and severe that you feel hopeless and worthless; I too have many days where I have felt this way. Simple tasks like doing the laundry and giving my toddler a bath have become so daunting and painful. I really true know how you feel. Being that we are only 33; and i say ONLY 33 because really we are not that old and all we want to do is be the matriarch we want to be for the family and do so at our absolute best. I too get scared to wake up and feel that heavy muscle aches and sleep inertia; just to have severe chest pain 5 seconds into waking up and it lingering on for the next 6-8 hours. My last episode lasted that long at least. Even being a nurse I try my best to “avoid the triggers” and use the education I have to deal with my symptoms the best I can. Its still a challenge every single day. I haven’t had a good Fibro day in what seems like over a year. How do you help yourself get through this? Willpower, faith? Not sure what your beliefs are but just to share and shed some insight, reading my Bible lately has helped keep my mind at ease when I feel like falling apart. What meds are you taking ? Have you tried any physical therapies or a chiropractor? I am on the verge of possibly starting Cymbalta per my PCP but waiting to talk to a Rheumatologist for the first time on Wednesday. Im praying that specialist will be able to help me. Id love to hear more of your story. Official friends for life :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

My faith has been shaken, I have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that this is what he had meant for me? Who would waste their time creating a creature just to suffer? I’m working on it, my brother who lives in California is trying to repair that. I take a lot of medications, I was the same as you, I never wanted to take anything, including the Synthroid but I am so desperate for a good treatment that I will try just about anything. I’m on medications for my thyroid, I take Lamictal and Cymbalta for my emotions because I cry a lot being in pain. I also take Vyvanse, it is a medication for ADHD which I have severely, this pill is the only thing that keeps me functioning for an 8 hour day. I take Lyrica that my rheumatologist prescribed but at this point it might as well be a placebo. I think just like a lot of other moms, my kids are what get me through. As bad as I feel I make their day when I am around, I know it would be that much worse not to be. I just want my life back, I want to enjoy doing things again or at least not try to bargain with the devil to get out of going places. I also use Medical Marijuana, I use it for the psychoactive effects, it is the only time I can be comfortable. I still feel the pain, it just makes it to where I don’t care as much so I’m not as bothered by it. It’s not the most prideful thing I’ve done but at this point I don’t care. I’ve tried walking, stretching and yoga and I basically wanted to die for about a week after each so I don’t my doctor that wasn’t happening anymore. I’m really glad you responded, that was my first post and I was afraid I’d post and that would be it.

Are you having any cognitive issues? Memory loss, stumble for words, forget what you are saying in the middle of a sentence? Also, how are you functioning the way you are with 5 kids? You my friend are a hero!

Hello my Friend,

I am sorry it took me this long to get back to you! Thank you for sharing all of that with me. I was starting to feel like I am the only 33-34 yr-old suffering like this and it’s so nice to be able to relate to someone my age. honestly feel like it’s been getting worse the last week that’s why I decided to jump back on the forum—I honestly forgot I had messaged you a couple months back. AnyWho to answer your question yes I have had all of the above cognitive issues —as I had maybe mentioned i am a director of nursing & I find myself totally forgetting what I’m saying in the middle of an in-service and it has nothing to do with stage fright as I’m very comfortable talking to large crowds but I literally forget what I’m saying in the middle of a sentence. serious brain fog every day. My pain has gotten so debilitating to the point where I am going to resort to medication my doctor prescribed me amitriptyline but I’m hesitant on it because I hear a lot of bad things :confused: I think I will go with Cymbalta. have you had any good experience with this I think it will also help with my anxiety and depression. And yes my kids keep me going just one hug one smile makes me recharge and forget about the pain temporarily. Hope to hear from you soon :heart: