Hi Penelope. Have the doctors checked to make sure you don't have a form of dysautonomia? It can cause the dizziness. www.dinet.org has a lot more info about that. I felt my health was really deteriorating too but I added magnesium and vitamin D to my gabapentin and other meds.I think it also helps to give yourself permission to rest without stressing. I know that's a lot harder than it sounds. I have fibro and Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. EDS is a genetic connective tissue disorder that causes the body to make bad collagen. The EDS seems to have causes the fibro for me. Any of these health issues can make people feel depressed but please don't give up. As a suicide survivor, I can tell you that there are more people who care than it seems. My brother committed suicide at 35. I know your therapist will be able to help tomorrow. Please remember that there are a lot of people who care and who know what you're going through. We're here for you.
I hear you on the pain and despair but please don't harm or kill yourself. Because what if a significant improvement or cure for fibro comes on the market soon? Or you feel differently in a few days? Or your situation changes? One thing my therapist taught me years ago is to not believe that things will always stay the same because they don't. Even your feelings.
You don't say if you're being treated for the headaches or not. But people on this site often compare how they treat their migraines here. One discussion on them is called, "Migraine not going away." It's on page 3 or 4, I believe. Also, you could use our search bar, searching for headaches or migraines. People have shared their treatments and quite a few have been discussed. I'm hoping that one might help you.
Have you been checked for autoimmune illnesses? Sometimes they can co-exist with fibro and can cause severe pain that doesn't respond to fibro meds. Siskiya has just posted a discussion on this very topic. It might be worth your while to be checked again. Also some people with fibro also have connective tissue illnesses and some of them can be quite painful, like Ehlers Danlos Syndrome.
I just read that if you call for help and are brought to a mental health hospital, you wouldn't be able to take your meds. God, that's cruel and stupid! Thank heaven you have a therapist to speak to when you need help.
It sounds so much like you want to repair your relations with your family. Have they given you any ideas of what it would take for them to come back into your life? Obviously you have every right to talk about your illness and let them know you hurt. On the other hand, maybe they get too overwhelmed to hear it after awhile. Is there some way that you and they could meet in the middle? Or even have a chosen word to use when they feel they can't listen any longer? I know my sis is usually pretty good at listening but sometimes she'll give me a sarcastic crack when she's had enough, and I tend to keep quiet at that time. I'm only using that as a possible example, obviously I don't know your family or your situation but it's sad to hear of you being alone and it'd be nice if you and they could mend some fences.
If that's not an option, then having a therapist is a great resource for handling emotional pain. It sounds like you have a good and caring one, from the little that you've said. But I'll echo what everyone else has said, please don't do anything to hurt yourself and please call: 1-800-273-TALK if you're really serious about harming yourself. At least you could talk to someone, then decline going to the hospital. Or demand that your pills go with you. I know, Penelope, it's an imperfect answer. I wish I could do better than that. But please know you're welcome here and we're happy to listen and offer gentle advice. We know what you're going through, if that's any solace.
I hope you can feel all the warm thoughts and hugs that are coming through to you from everyone. I am glad that you are talking to your therapist, and remember the talk line that Scott mentioned. We have all had those thoughts of suicide when it just seems too much to bear but remember that there are people who do care and are there to listen and support you. Hopefully you can get some answers after your biopsy. There must be something going on that needs to be looked at more closely. SK had some wonderful advice. I take probiotics and digestive enzymes that are very helpful too.
My brother said the same to me today. He has frontal lobe brain damage and his son and wife are not giving him any consideration. He is really disabled from a car accident and they look upon him as a leech.
I wish you the best and hope you never find that strength.
Penelope, Please ask your doctors for some B12 shots as your nervous system can't work properly without it if they won't then get some sub-linguel B12 Bcomplex and you put it under your tongue .I know it doesn't sound like much but it can be amazing if you have malabsortion problems .Your nervous system needs it to be healthy.it isn't a cure but it can help the depression.If anyone wants to know who did the research it was a Doctor Lark Lands ,she did the research on diabetics,but it really is needed by all people who are fighting chronic disease.My husband had AIDS and it saved our marriage ,he would get so depressed and angry,b12 shot and 15 minutes later he was the g uy I wanted to marry,One of the reasons that people with chronic illness need more than normal amounts is they don't metabolize it the same .So even if your levels are normal you should try it.If you have taken anti=biotics and have not received treatment to replensh your good bacteria in your intestines you will not have the bacteria that enables you to absorb it from your food,,this is one of the reasons for bad drunks. It is why the first line of treatment for them is a B12 shot.There can also be other trace minerals missing from your system like vitminen D thymine and niacine.that can cause depression to be worse also.I know it doesn't help tonight but try to eat some red meat if you can digest it it is where this substances are.Please know that here we care and we are here for you,we may not understand it all but we can relate to some.I wish for you good weather ,friends ,and an end to lonliness .Sorry about the spelling and typing I am having a hard time seeing what i did with my glasses.With all the Love in my heart know I am here for you.Sarah.715-■■■■■■■■
Hi Penelope, I am sorry you are having such a difficult time in your life. I am new to this site but from what I see we are definately not alone so I hope you will recieve some support from all of these people going thru similar things. I can definately relate to you as I have had daily headaches for over 15 years and it is very draining and I also suffer from vertigo several times a year along with many other fibro symptons. Please know you are not alone and things will get better for you xxx