I am not looking forward to work this week as I know they will take me to stage 1 sickness meeting. was off sick at the w/end due to worsening fibro pains and trigeminal neuralgia pain and they do notmake any allowances for sickness. They tell you meetngs are purely in order to see how they can support you in maintaining your attendance at work, but then go on to inform you that if you are off again the meetings will be escalated to next stage and if you are off a third episode they are looking to terminate your employment. I have tried to explain in the past how stressful these meetings are for me and how they exacerbate the illness but they are not interested. Feeling stressed already and I am not back until Saturday. Oh well have to try and chill.
Can u try and get a note from you dr explaining how stress effects your illness? If not get some info online. Maybe even consider asking to work part-time if that is available. Full time work is too much for many of us. I wish I had more to try to help. I hope for the best for you. Hugs xxxx
Dr has already advised them of this but t makes no difference. I have already cut my hours and now only work 20hr a week. Their excuse is that we are what is called front line staff and we have to be re in case of emergencies. I am fully aware of this and have told them so but their attitude is f you are fit to do the work you should not be there. Thanks for the support, it is appreciated. Sometimes you just have to get it out or will think about it all the time.
I want to explain to my employer in the past what kind of illnesses I’m dealing with, I was amazed at how supportive they were.
Each and every time though that I had to miss work, more than 1 day I did bring in a doctor’s note.
I do know that there are specific laws to protect your job and you’re missing work due to your illnesses.
I don’t know what they are, or where to look them up though. But I can tell you the first step is to get yourself a doctor’s note for missing work.
annann I will be praying for you as I’ve gone through the same thing last year.
I have fibro and TN as well I know how hard it is. I was working full time managing a salon. Within 6 months or being diagnosed with TN I realized I was killing myself for my job and that was not worth it.
What kind of work do you do? Maybe we can all brain storm here your and get you a solution as far as keeping your help and keeping your income.
My solution was, becoming self employed and working part time.
I give you a big huge hug and a nice gentle rub on your face I sure hope it gets better because I do understand how hard it can be.
1 secret I am fine with my TN pain, is my daughter had an ear infection and they gave me your drops to number your pain. Now that she is done with them and doesn’t need them, I’m actually using them on my face.
They are called, Antipyrine&Benzocaine Otic Silution,USP. Of course there for your pain but it has been quite a big help in my face pain.
Hi,
Sorry to hear about all the stress your job is creating for you. I think you have gotten some good advice from the others who have responded to your post. My only question is, have you filled out FMLA paperwork? If not, you should check into how to get that process started.
Good luck!
Sorry don't know what his paperwork is. I am an nurse practitioner in emergency care 2 X 10 hour shifts fer week, night duty. I work nights beccause I am main carer for my husband whio is disabled. My work are not very supportive of staff who has medical problems.. The needs of the service always come first. they told me once before when I asked about the needs of the carer that my needs were being met because I was paid a salary. The old saying springs to mind "who cares for the carer." sorry to be such a pesimist just now I always try to look on bright side but someties it is hard. This is why I am so glad I have found this support grroup, because sometimes you just need a good moan. Thanks for all your suggestions.
Hi,
FMLA paperwork is Family Medical Leave and I don't remember what the A stands for. Sorry. I do not know how large the company is you work for, but I do know they must have a minimum number of employees before they are required to carry this benefit. You would need to check with your HR dept.
Jackie
I get the added stress of being a carer. I am a mobile psychotherapist for the severely mentally ill. My current job thankfully is very accommodating and I have a lot of flexibility, however I am there to work and the expectations are extremely high. I regularly check in with my supervisor about my medical health, and most importantly what I am doing to get better. If I am out I tell her why, I take responsibility, and I make up the time when I can. What is a hard balance, but a key one, is that while we are entitled to fair treatment on the job, we are there to work.
My past job was similar to where you are now. I was working in a hospital system run clinic, we had no sick days, and calling out came with serious consequences and micromanaging meetings like what you describe.
Bringing documentation, and preparing notes regarding your current treatment plan is a good idea for the meeting. Also if there is any reasonable accommodation you can ask for, I'd suggest doing it. Though it is important always on the job to keep the focus on how you are going to improve and be able to be there to do your job.
Unfortunately accommodation needs to be reasonable for the employer, a lot of jobs in the medical field can be fairly strict especially in hospital systems. It may be worth doing what you can to remain in good standing and look for another job.
Even though my current job is far more stressful, way more demanding, involves more responsibility, and higher expectations having a management staff that is supportive (w/in reason!) makes such a difference. When I had to be out for surgery in the fall even the CEO was concerned that I had enough support at home and that I was making a good recovery. At my current job I am viewed as a whole person and they recognized that the person who deals with all the illness, is the same one who has as the strengths and does a great job.
I really feel for you my last job which had similar policies around sick leave was just a nightmare. Just do what you can do to be present and good at your job, and at the meeting back yourself up with documentation.
Hmmmmm, maybe if you use the magical term, "I have a disability and hope you can support me around it," that might make them perk up their ears and listen! The reason being that the word "disability" conjures up the image of a lawsuit in their mind. As in, why goodness gracious you, you might just go ahead and call up a lawyer if you're illegally terminated. (You don't actually say this, just imply it with the magical term.
I'd also make sure to send them something from your doctor diagnosing you as having a disability (fibro.and the trigeminal neuralgia, if it's also a recognized disability.) And a doctor's note telling you you need those days off, if you went to the doc and got one. Of course, keep copies of everything and file them carefully. You really might need them, if they wrongfully fired you at some point (which a lawyer could tell you.)
Good luck, my dear. I know you must be suffering terribly and worrying just as much. I hope you can feel a bit better and worry a bit less.
Hugs,
Petunia
Hi Annann,
Well your job and the place of employment do seem to carry with them the need to have you there. I know that the nurses who had to find replacement CNAs for those who called in sick had one heck of a time filling in those holes, especially if it was at the last minute.
Is it possible for you to be a nurse in a less demanding location? I would think that a doctor's office might offer more flexibility than the Emergency Room. Or maybe you could do a google search on nursing jobs that are more flexible than your current situation. I think it'll be hard to strike a good balance between the flexibility to be out ill when your illness strikes and being available to those who are in an emergency situation when your schedule demands it.
I think that Lori has offered you some excellent info, including the words telling you to stay in good standing while looking for a job that better suits your current needs. I'm not suggesting this to be a meanie: you have two very painful illnesses and stress makes at least one of them much worse. A job with a reasonable schedule would probably put your mind much more greatly at rest.
Hi Guys,
Thanks for all the suggestions. I am trying to look for another job and have been for past year, have had a few interviews as well but unfortunately other employers have to be told about disabilities and this kind of puts them off. Was offered other position but had to decline it as they wanted me to work away from home.
I will speak to my woork again and ask them for referral to Occupational Health and see if they will agree that this is covered under DDA. In total I have only had 6 days off in past year as I do not take time off unless I am really bad and having difficulty moving and thinking. If occupational health agree I could suggest these days be covered by disability leave.
Thanks again for you suggestions.