Pain and guilt

I have been feeling bad for some time but then I start to feel better. well, this past wk I have really been haven the inside jitters all over and this morning I woke up with them again so back to bed I went. thought I could sleep it off. woke up again with them. I have been wanting to try and go back to work but everytime I go back I can only last about 2 wks by that second week, Im bed ridden, cant get up. now I feel really guilty cause Im unable to. is anyone else on disability for this prblm. I filed for it almost a yr ago an havnt heard yet anything. I just want to cry. Im feeling a pit of depression coming on an I am fighting it really bad trying to think positive, gettng out with the girls doing things with the hubby and my mom bless her heart she gets me out a lil. this disease is getting worse eems like by the day. Im not even going into other disease you usually have with this beast. it causes other things Im sure. bcuz Im unable to wrk I stay bored. yea I do what I have t do around the house but I just get bored easily. and boy the attention span is awful. nothing hlds my attention for long at all any more. enough of me right now....just venting!

Gigi,

I totally understand! It is very difficult to work like this. I was off for 18 months. I'm a dental hygeinist. When I thought I was able to try and go back to work I choose to do fill in hygiene work. I just fill in at two different offices. That way I am more in control of how much I work and allows me to work a day and have a day of two off. I feel more in control of my schedule this way.

I dont know if this is an option for you but it seems to work better for me than trying to work a regular scheldule. I'm scheduled to work 4 days in a row in Oct and I so scared!

Hope you have some days soon that are better.

Hugs, Tina

thank you....that is an option I am considering. Im scared bcuz I have soo much brain fog, I cant think straight. I used to work in the medical field. I worked in direct admits at the hospital yrs ago before i got this bad, and my confidance seems shattered. Im not to confident in much anymore but I keep telling myself I can do this. it is scarey. But I think I might try wrking part time if I can find a place thats hiring. just 2 or 3 days a wk is all I want. I think Ill take your suggestion and run with it. thanks!