Good afternoon everyone! I haven't been on much... just too overwhelmed with life in general. I am having such a hard time coming to grips with this disease and how it has changed me. I am almost constantly in a fog, so tired I could pass out almost anytime, hurting everywhere... I know it's not just a flare because those are so much worse! I'm struggling alot with my job and just getting up and going to work is so hard. I don't think I could make it on disability though even if I were to get it.
I recently had to have a LEEP procedure for some precancerous cells. That is causing my fibro to flare. I just feel like giving up. I don't know how much longer I can hold on. The guilt of being a 'bad parent' because I go to bed or lay on the couch as soon as I get home from work is enough to make me give it all up. Help!
Nikijo, I am so sorry for how you are feeling. A while ago I was going thru a bad time so I withdrew from here and did not read, respond or do anything. I told myself I don't have the energy but I wasn't feeling any better after a couple of months. One day my husband encouraged me to get back on so I did. It really helped my mental state. I did not necessarily write anything but I would read what people wrote in response to other people and I found I started feeling better about how I was feeling. So please any in there. Now I try to encourage other people to hang in there and not withdraw. When we want to stop coming here that is when we need to be here the most.
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Jackie S
Hi Nykijo. I am so sorry you feel this way. I have struggled just like you. Guilt is an awful thing. I know it’s hard for you but you have to give yourself a break. When you are resting, remember you are doing what you have to do to be your best. Just like taking a pill to keep you healthy, you must rest to keep you as healthy as possible. Once I finally started to accept the “new me”, it really helped a lot. I have to laugh at my forgetfulness and not get frustrated…which I’m still working on it. Today sounds like a bad day for you. I hope tomorrow is much better!
Best Wishes,
Melyn
Thank you everyone for your well wishes. I am trying to hang in there. Some days it feels impossible. I won't get the results of my procedure for another week and a half... When I called the office today to tell them the cramps I was having was horrendous and I could barely uncurl myself the nurse said to take ibuprofen lol. I had to laugh! I sometimes feel as if the doctors just dismiss what's wrong and I don't have much support at home. I will definitely try to get on here more. The inspiration and caring is wonderful! Thanks again!
Nykijo, In addition to coming here,
you could also maybe consider getting counselling. It really helped me to be able to unburden with a counselor when things were just too overwhelming. Stress can send us into a flare easily causing more pain and more stress and then more pain. It’s a terrible cycle to get stuck in. Good luck, hon.
Laurie
I agree about getting counseling. When I was first diagnosed I quickly realized that I would soon be depressed and needed to talk about what was going on with me. The anger I felt as well as the loss of my regular daily life. There are a lot of emotions to deal with when you have Fibro and talking about it to someone who will listen is a critical step in helping us “keeping it together”.
I hope for the best for you. Please let us know how you are doing.
HUGS.
Today sounds like a bad day for you. I hope tomorrow is much better!