When Is Enough?: Enough

As it says. When is enough, well enough.

I know that his is a community of people who suffer more or less from the same thing, Fibro or something similar. We all have different stories. We all suffer differently. We all have different symptoms. Some of us are more able to manage our struggles then others. I have read a lot about Fibro and learned a lot. There is good advice out there and there is also very bad advice. The thing that frustrates me to know end is that I feel like I'm being constantly push to do thing that either I have already tried and did not work or I am incapable of doing it or it is pseudoscience bull****. Yes there is a lot of that out there and I even got into an argument with a doctor over a pseudo suggestion. I'm sick of seeing that kinda crap being push on people because they may be desperate to try anything. Its a con that is all it is.
OK OK sorry for that rant. I guess I should get back on point.

I have read and seen a lot of stories about people who have overcome the great adversity that has been thrust-ed upon them by this terrible condition. I am really glad that these people were able to do over come their adversities and rise to the occasion. . Also I see a ton of motivational literature that is supposed to lift thy spirits just by reading it. However what about the others that are fighting hard and getting no where fast at all. Or the motivational literature well does not motivate them. I'm sorry just because that or that works for John or Jane Doe does not mean in anyway that it will work for others. Now I do know that the opposite does hold true. It does work for some people. When this does not work feels like that we are either weak or not doing something right or being told that we don't want to get better. We are judged to the degree that is if someone else was able to do it then so should we. I'm sure most of us have heard this at one time or another. There is a quot that I have read that hit home what I'm trying to say.

“Curious that we spend more time congratulating people who have succeeded than encouraging people who have not.”
Neil deGrasse Tyson

So the fact the all our situations are different make it unlikely that success stories will work for most others if its replicated. So what happens to all that inspiration that is garnered from all the literature when it fails? What happens when there is almost no respite from the pain, the stress, the..well what ever is making life challenging in all respects due to Living with Fibromyalgia.

Well for me I turned very cynical. Things started going downhill for me four years or so ago. Now I fully realize there are many out there who have lived with this for decades or even longer (I could not even imagine). So yea I have not been dealing with this all that long, however I really feel like I'm at my wits end. Fibro has destroyed my life. I lost my Fiance and child. I have not worked since 2010. I have had virtually no money since. At best I get about 120 a month to work with from my Stepfather. I have had the constant threat of homelessness for just as long. I have virtually no one in my life that I can turn to anything. I've been fighting with all of this stress on my own. I have family around here but they do'nt talk about it. They don't get it and have no willingness to learn either. I even do not have friends to confide in. I have been fighting for disability and have gotten no wear at all. I'm on my second application and just received yet another denial. Lawyer time again uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgggggggg. I have done everything that has been asked of me and talk to whoever I have needed to to get help. I do receive some assistance. I get help with rent from a local program, I just never know when it may end. Yes I'm on the snap program that is not a lot to work with but eh what am I going to do. Can my situation be worse why yes it can, and that's the stress that I have been under for four years now. I'm so borderline. It has almost happened a few times. I'm just tired, so tired. Emotionally and physically, and I know there are many others as well.

So what are we to do when despite following all advice and suggestion: Or when success stores or inspiration literature fail. When nothing is working, changing, improving, or even just keeping the status quote is just damn near impossible. Yes there are some us out there that this is the case. The stress is to much. The pain is to much. The uncertainty is to much. What can be done to help them. How are they to get out of that crappy situation, or it seems for far away that it might as well be unattainable. What are you going to do, be condescending. I have seen this way to much. ( Just live one day at a time. Fight the good fight. It only last for .... long. etc etc). How do you know they have not lived day by day. How would you know if the did not fight the good fight. Wost of all. What if they can't. Then what? What are the options then. We all have our limits.

So back to my first statement: When Is Enough: Well Enough.

I can think of only 2 suggestions. The 1st is to REALLY talk to your MD about maybe signing yourself into the hospital for 3 to 5 days.

& the 2nd is to make an appt w/the Dept of Human Srvcs & REALLY talk to the social worker, they have/know ALL the secrets to getting us the help we need!!!

M

since i doubt hearing my tale of woe will do you any good i just want to say that i do wish you all the best in hopes that something will turn around for you. Maybe someone else will have advice/suggestions/encouragement that will be useful and helpful to you

HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGs

Suzie

Hello Homadais,

I will just echo suzies message, that we all wish you well. I don't know how some people carry on, I really don't - but they do. I am not going to give you any condescending messages, or advice about things you have no doubt tried. We are all different on here, but all want to survive. Please let us know how you are getting on.

Take care, Anne

So yes this discussion is a shout out of my own feelings, frustration and part of my story. Yes I am at a very serious crossroad for sure. I also wanted to put this as a discussion to the seriousness of the fact that no matter how positive we may be, or how much we may learn on our own or through others, that it still will not change anything for some of us. So what can be done to help these people? What can be truly don to turn their despair around? Whatever my case may be there are others that are worse, and I'm just trying to just bring about a helthy discusion on what can do done for those who have lost all hope.

I do apologize if I have not gotten my point across well. I do find expressing my thoughts through words very difficult. So if anyone has any questions then please ask I will try to clarify.

Hi Homadais,have you talked with your doctor about medications? While a medication will not change your circumstances, it CAN help by lifting your thoughts so that you feel more capable of handling things. Also, if you need to talk to someone, you can always call 1800-273-TALK, there are friendly people there who can listen. I can tell you from my personal experience that even when you are in despair, things can turn around. For me, it took a combination of medication, an excellent counselor, and sincere effort on my end to work toward a more positive mind-set. Did it change the fact that I have Fibro? No, it didn't but it helped me learn coping strategies to better handle it and life in general. Was it easy to change my thought patterns? No, it wasn't easy and it was a process - I had set backs but I just kept at it. For once, my stubbornness really paid off as I had decided that no matter what, I was going to find a way to feel better emotionally. Please know that I am sending you positive thoughts and I really hope you talk to your doctor as soon as possible. Gentle hugs.

Someone asked for me to keep in touch and drop a line and let know how I was holding up after I made this post. So I thought I would say that I am doing a little better in my head space. Still frustrated to no end but still hanging in there.

Thanks Homadais for checking in, I am glad things are a little better. Sometimes it just takes small baby steps and then before you know it you will see how far you have come. :-).